REDISCOVERING FAMILY VALUES

David Bragg lives in Cape Girardeau. He is minister of the Church of Christ. He moved here with his family six years ago.

Much information has been dispersed in recent years regarding the breakdown of the family. The list of contributing factors would include exposure to violent and sexually saturated media, materialistic lifestyles, hectic career-oriented schedules that leave little or no time to nurture the family circle, priorities that have been misplaced and a lack of respect for authority.

Every generation has heard voices critical of the traditional family. In the face of this endless stream of threats one must eventually approach the question of how to respond in a positive manner.

There is no doubt that family values are under attack from within and without the home. However, I do not believe the family is breaking down; it has rather been forsaken.

Roots are in religion

The traditional family is deeply and intrinsically rooted in the Judeo-Christian writings of the Bible. This being true, the logical solution is to renew the ancient pattern for the family.

What do we mean by the phrase "family values?" I would offer the following definition: cherished convictions that provide stability to a group of related people bound together by love.

An examination of this definition can greatly assist one's efforts to restore to the family unit the values gradually being surrendered. Irrespective of religious persuasion (yet recognizing the vital role a common faith plays in the stability of family life) the Bible provides basic principles that the world must respect if these embattled values are to be exalted.

One's convictions must be stronger than any circumstance. Throughout the Old and New Testaments the people of God learned, though too often the hard way, not to rely on the various troubling circumstances that came upon them. The conviction in the basic rules of conduct remain constant in any given setting. Some things are right no matter what the consequences. Some things are simply wrong.

Families, in general, have lost their conviction. One needs to clearly understand this sense of morality and diligently seek to consistently apply it no matter what the outward circumstances. This will provide the much needed stability absent in many homes.

Commitment to marriage

Convictions produce stability. The cornerstone of stability is expressed in the confident assertion that "we will stay together!" Most marriage vows contain words similar to "until death do us part." However, too many marriages break up when troubled water rocks the boat. Jesus said, "What God has joined together let no man separate (Matthew 19:6)." The stability a child most desperately needs the parent must provide. If dad and mom walked out on each other, how can the children be assured they will not walk out on them?

Love is unselfish

The basic teaching of Christianity is that love is unselfish. In our definition, it was noted that the family is bound together by love. Jesus did not seek His best interest in leaving heaven to die on the cross. Love often demands the sacrifice of one's personal desires and wants (especially parents) for the needs of another.

Selfishness is perhaps the most common cause of marital heartbreak.

The family and its values are under attack. The tools to repair are found as close as God's Word: conviction, stability and true Christian love. Do not give up on the family idea, it cannot fail. But we can.