Just what our country needs: another exclusive, by-invitation-only organization. You're only eligible for membership is you haven't slept in the Lincoln Bedroom.
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President Clinton's excuse for aggressive fund-raising tactics is that Democrats needed the money. Well, at least beggars, panhandlers and thieves now have a new patron saint.
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The latest Las Vegas odds are 8 to 5 that Congress will reform campaign finance laws at the moment the solstice reaches its southernmost point in Hades.
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As Al Gore tries to explain his questionable money-raising practices, the nation hasn't seen a vice president sputter so much since Dan Quayle tried to spell "potato."
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Gov. Mel Carnahan is still pursuing his idea of an Information Superhighway despite a Department of Transportation warning that it has had to extend its 15-year building program for the 16th time.
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Speaking of the Missouri Department of Transportation, its construction signs have been changed from "Progress as Promised" to "We Will Finish This Project When We Have More Money or Within the Next 100 Years, Whichever Comes Later."
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