LETTERS: PARENTS HOST TEEN PARTIES

To the editor:

Who's invited? All teen-agers from Jackson, Cape Central and Notre Dame high schools.

What's the occasion? All-night party -- bring your own beer.

When? Just about any weekend.

Where's the party? Home of various parents in your hometown.

You will not see this invitation printed or published in the paper, but it happens almost every Friday and Saturday night. Parents of 15-to-18-year-old high school students are hosting teen-age parties every weekend with beer, wine and other alcoholic beverages which are either provided by the host parents or tacitly permitted to be consumed on the premises.

For the unsuspecting parent, you will not receive a written invitation like the fictitious one above. I you are lucky, your son or daughter will tell you that they have been invited to a party, or they may simply tell you they are spending the night with a friend. Although the word "party" may raise some concerns, you probably have known the host parents for many years. They may be business leaders in your community, or they may be teachers, lawyers, bank officers, accountants, doctors or nurses. In some cases, they may even be close personal friends. They probably go to church, and, as far as you know, they have never broken any laws that really matter. In many cases the host parents will be respected members of your community, and you will feel that you can trust them to be good chaperones. In any event, you are confident that if these parents decided to allow underage drinking in their home, surely they would at least call you to get your OK.

Unfortunately, this trust-your-fellow-parent assumption may be misguided. Adult-supervised teen-age drinking has become the rule rather than the exception. But wait a minute. Isn't that illegal? Don't they call that contributing to the delinquency of a minor? What about ethics, morals and family values? How can responsible adults justify or rationalize hosting a party and allowing teen-agers to drink in their homes? The typical response would be, "Well, I know they're going to drink anyway, so I'd rather have them drinking in my home where I can keep an eye on them. At least they won't be running up and down the highway."

Does this rationalization make sense to you? Why don't we just hand out a few joints, show a pornographic movie and pass out condoms while we're at it? Then we will have all of the teen-age vices covered. After all, they are going to do it anyway, so why not let them do it in a safe environment. Better yet, let's make it even safer by setting up a special party room at the local community center where teen-agers can smoke, drink and have safe sex under the supervision of a doctor or nurse? This suggestion would be absurd to most people, yet it is the logical extension of the rationale suggested by host parents of teen-age drinking.

In reality, adult supervision of teen-age drinking has been around for a long time, but it seems to be especially trendy with the current yuppie generation of parents. Although parents have attempted to justify, or at least rationalize, this trend, it cannot be defended under our current legal, ethical, moral or religious standards. How can parents who have always taken pride in being good role models for the young people in their community explain the obvious contradictions? Parents who have coached Little League baseball, soccer or basketball and who would never dream of cursing, smoking or drinking in front of their players are suddenly inviting them into their home as teen-agers and, in essence, saying, "I know it is against the law, and I know your parents may not approve, but it's not problem if you want to drink on my property." This contradiction cannot be explained to a teen-ager. To a 15-year-old, the obvious truth is that all that role model stuff was just a facade. "If Mr. and Mrs. (you fill in the blank) are letting us do it in their home, then it must be OK. I'm tired of being left out of all the fun, and what do my parents know anyway?"

Despite the rationalization, the truth is that teen-agers are generally too young to make a mature decision about whether they should drink or smoke. Both tobacco and alcohol have proven to be addictive, and, despite claims to the contrary, teen-agers have been targeted by liquor and tobacco company advertising because of their vulnerability. Once hooked, these habits lead to immense profits for years to come. The trendy practice of adult-supervised teen-age drinking is destructive, cannot be rationalized or justified, is not fair to other parents who have not been consulted or informed and should not be either condoned or tacitly approved by responsible parents in our community.

JACK H. KNOWLAN JR.

Cape Girardeau

EDITOR'S NOTE: Jack Knowlan is an administrative law judge with the Missouri Division of Workers Compensation and serves on the Jackson School Board.