KINDER'S COMMENTARY: TOBACCO LAWYERS ARE BIGGEST RIPOFF IN 178 YEARS OF STATEHOOD

Some folks no doubt wonder why a few of us state senators won't let the issue of the pending ripoff by the tobacco lawyers die. Responding to queries from a reporter from this newspaper, Attorney General Jay Nixon's press aide last week sputtered her exasperation: "You're the only newspaper that is calling us up to ask about this!" There followed from her the sticks-and-stones insults directed toward yours truly that are no doubt triggered by striking a key on her word processor.

First, as noted here before: What Jay Nixon is doing is simply the biggest ripoff of Missouri taxpayers in 178 years of statehood. A few years back, Mr. Nixon's predecessor as AG got his office into loads of trouble over something called the Second-Injury Fund scandal. For that caper, Nixon's predecessor and his party paid a dear price (among which was Nixon's own narrow '92 victory over an opponent deemed by most to be far more qualified). Some people went to prison. Mr. Nixon's cozy little deal is, indeed, the Second-Injury Fund on steroids.

Second, as fleshed out in a service-club speech I'm giving across the state trying to awaken Missourians to the stakes, this tobacco settlement represents the largest unlegislated tax increase in American history. That is to say, settlements such as this involve a transfer of the awesome taxing powers of legislative bodies from elected lawmakers to judges who are, in most cases, unelected. Smokers pay 45 cents a pack -- forever. Our forefathers fought a revolution over less than that.

Third, in the bargain, we get these favored few dozen personal-injury lawyers of the trial bar. These attorneys, handpicked from his contributor list by Jay Nixon, represent a tiny minority of a minority of the bar. They stand to reap hundreds of millions of dollars in fees for a few months' work. One caveat: Providing bipartisan cover to the whole scheme, and in on the looming mega-payday, is a lone Republican attorney who for 13 years before last year was a Missouri Supreme Court judge, appointed by John Ashcroft during his governorship. Interestingly, Ashcroft isn't lauding his former chief of staff's latest venture.

Search through the literature and you'll find gems such as the one where leading tobacco lawyer Wendell Gauthier urges his fellow lawyers-in-looting to regard themselves as "a fourth branch of government." If that be so, it's a branch that pays a lot better than the other three, has no accountability, carries on its business behind closed doors and doesn't have to put up with those pesky little events known as election campaigns. Except, that is, to recycle a small cut of the loot in donations back to the guy -- Jay Nixon -- whose casual decision made the whole ripoff possible.

Consider the evidence from other states. The first settlement from the first four states, including Florida, awarded $8 billion to a few dozen attorneys for their work. From Wisconsin this summer came news that three law firms submitted their bill for payment. The requested sum: $847.5 million. From Massachusetts, the tobacco lawyers' request, out of an $8 billion award to the state, was a mere $2 billion.

What shall Missouri's favored few tobacco lawyers be paid? A real good question for the guy who picked them -- Jay Nixon.

A year-old lawsuit, styled Kinder vs. Nixon, seeks to ring down the curtain on the whole charade. It is scheduled for oral argument in the Court of Appeals in KC at the end of September. Meanwhile, attorneys statewide are buzzing: What will the largely Ashcroft-appointed Supreme Court do if and when this one reaches them?

~Peter Kinder is assistant to the president of Rust Communications and a state senator from Cape Girardeau.