Twisted faith

By Jennifer Shaffer

My head has been in the clouds, preoccupied by the funnel and wall types. The Midwest has been bombarded with seemingly never ending tornadoes. The devastation in nearby Joplin, Mo., is unimaginable. A friend of ours is now a pastor in Joplin and on the front lines trying to help where he can. His recounts compel and make my heart ache.

As the people of Joplin emerge from the fog we will hear stories of heroes, survival, terrifying choices and stark loss. We'll also see vultures prey upon the victims. Survivors will move forward rebuilding and grieving and consolidating their memories and resources. People like me who don't have a personal connection to the loss will soon forget just as Japan, Haiti and New Orleans have begun to fade from our sympathies.

We've spent a good deal of time in our basement hoping our preparation is enough and wondering when it's safe to emerge. All this pondering time has me philosophizing about the comments survivors sometimes make about it being a miracle they were saved or that God or angels were looking out for them or that the power of prayer saved them. I understand the sentiment and have probably said something similar. But the implication is that those who lost life were either not praying hard enough, not loved enough, or their angels were just busy. I have a problem with that. I know God is there in the eye of Joplin, in the midst of all the devastation, and in the hearts of all who were saved and lost.

I believe in the power of prayer, just not in our power to control. When our prayer requests go seemingly unheeded, there is still an answer. I believe prayer helps us cope in times of need and that God listens. Over time, my prayers have evolved. There used to be a lot of "please do this or don't let this, God." Now there's more "please help me accept this," or "give me the strength." The gift of free will reminds me that it is all in how we handle it.

Tornadoes pollinate. Floods replenish the soil. Mosquitoes are vital to the food chain. Viruses kill bacteria. Earthquakes, car accidents, cancer and war are not punishments. They are the consequence of this crazy ride called life. All actions have a reaction. All devastation has a benefit, however small or hidden.

Recently I was nervous about the approaching weather. I prepared the basement with supplies. I picked my son up from school early. When the sirens alarmed we put on bicycle helmets, put the baby in her car seat, and surrounded ourselves with couch cushions in the basement. Then we prayed the Lord's prayer, emphasizing, Thy will be done. I don't think the cell passed safely over us because someone asked the Hand of God to cover us. Science just made it so.

I cannot imagine losing so much so quickly. I can't imagine what I would have done had I been selecting light bulbs at the Home Depot when the sirens went off. Though all this makes me want to build a concrete bunker, I know living in fear is not the answer. I only hope that when my darkest hour arrives that I will find the strength to let it be and find the light. We can prepare. We can pray. We can have faith that God is always within us. And we can be there when it happens to our neighbor.

Jennifer Shaffer is a former Cape Girardeau resident. She is the daughter of Dori Lage and the late Wally Lage.