MISSOURIANA

Times change. Before his recent veto was overridden, Gov. Mel Carnahan couldn't lose. And before Kurt Warner came along, the St. Louis Rams couldn't win.

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Maybe it's unfair to accuse Vice President Gore of being stiff. He may just be suffering muscle fatigue from looking over his shoulder to see if Bill Bradley is gaining.

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One of the nice things about having someone like Jesse Ventura in politics is that the media never has to look for anything more sensationally absurd than his last statement.

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Ambivalence is something experienced by anyone living in rural Missouri who is asked to pray for rain -- but not until farmers finish the harvest.

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If you are anticipating next year's elections with relish, you are probably someone who likes dentists and proctologists.

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Social Security recipients will get a monthly $10 increase starting Jan. 1, giving retirees something to anticipate in addition to the Y2K bug.

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Congress has at last agreed on how to spend at least half of the federal budget: half to lower taxes, half to defense, half to run the government, halft to hometown projets and half to emergencies.

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A pessimist is someone who believes the optimist who says we are living in the best of all possible worlds.