"Torture Music" Not So Bad

I realized today that I just might be partially torture-proof.

I came to this insight regarding this fairly grim subject after visiting a couple websites -- www.reprieve.org.uk and www.ZerodB.org -- which are working to stop what they call "torture music."

These are songs that have reputedly been played at deafening levels for hours, days and even months to "break" detainees held at Guantanamo Bay and other secret prisons the U.S. has around the world.

Here is the list of songs that these sites say have been used for torture:

• AC/DC - Hell's Bells
• AC/DC - Shoot to Thrill
• Aerosmith
• Barney the Purple Dinosaur - theme tune
• Bee Gees - Stayin' Alive
• Britney Spears
• Bruce Springsteen - Born in the USA
• Christina Aguilera - Dirrty
• David Gray - Babylon
• Deicide - F*** Your God
• Don McLean - American Pie
• Dope - Die MF Die
• Dope - Take Your Best Shot
• Dr. Dre
• Drowning Pools - Bodies
• Eminem - Kim
• Eminem - Slim Shady
• Eminem - White America
• Li'l Kim
• Limp Bizkit
• Matchbox Twenty - Gold
• Meat Loaf
• Metallica - Enter Sandman
• Neil Diamond - America
• Nine Inch Nails - March of the Pigs
• Nine Inch Nails - Mr. Self-Destruct
• Prince - Raspberry Beret
• Queen - We are The Champions
• Rage Against the Machine - Killing in the Name Of
• Red Hot Chilli Peppers
• Saliva - Click Click Boom
• Sesame Street - theme tune

My first blush was that this list would make a decent compilation collection. I like about 80% of the music listed and as far as the other 20%, I'm just not that familiar with those artists work. It's very possible that I would like their songs too.

Rather than appearing to be torturous, it looks like a really good mix to me. I could see loading these on my IPod and doing some cardio. Even the Sesame Street theme wouldn't be so bad.

I was a little surprised by the fact that Queen's song "We are The Champions" is part of the torture list, but not its companion tune "We Will Rock You." As far as classic rock music is concerned, it's almost a little sacrilegious not to play these two songs as one. The lack of the latter song is annoying, but I wouldn't call it torture.

While perusing the list, I noticed that I actually was an unintentional practitioner of "torture music" when I lived in Myers Hall at SEMO during the mid-1980s.

I cranked up Don McLean and the Bat of Hell album from Meatloaf on more than one occasion and played them over and over and over…

Of course, the guys living on my floor at the time had the option to leave whereas these detainees do not.

I suppose there is music that would be torturous to me if I had to hear it for hours or days on end.

For instance, if I had to listen to the 1982 song "Mickey" by one-hit wonder Toni Basil for more than a few minutes I would find that pretty agonizing. You know the song. The lyrics repeat "Oh Mickey, you're so fine, You're so fine you blow my mind, Hey Mickey, Hey Mickey" a number of times.

It's one of those songs that when it gets in your head, it just won't go away. Just mentioning the song's name and a line of lyrics can bring on excruciating pain.

Well, at least that's the effect it has on me, and probably now for you too. Sorry.

Anyhow, the efforts by these websites to stop this torture music almost seem a little futile. How do you stop alleged torture performed against alleged detainees by alleged U.S government operatives working out of alleged secret prisons located in alleged third-world countries?

It's kind of like chasing fog.

However, there was one possible solution that came to my mind that reprieve.org.uk and ZerodB.org may not have considered.

Perhaps, they should put the Recording Industry Association of America on the case.

The RIAA are the guys who shook down all those U.S. citizens a few years ago over downloaded music they claimed was illegally gotten off the Internet. I imagine if they have the gall to not only track down, but to also sue a deceased grandmother for somehow downloading 700 songs without a computer, that they would have no qualms about going after the U.S. government.

And based on the letter of the law, this alleged torture music does qualify as a public performance, if more than one detainee at a time is being forced to listen to the same song.

I think if anyone can find these alleged prisons and collect royalties -- plus interest and penalties of course -- it will be these guys from the RIAA.

Who knows, they might even be able to stop the torture music.