Doing the Wave

Many of you remember the phenomenon of doing “the wave,” generally occurring at sporting events. Spectators would stand in groups as the (human) wave approached, then sit back down after it passed on by. Although it’s not known precisely when this began, it’s generally thought to have started in the late 1970s/early 1980s. A guy named Krazy George Henderson (really!) perfected the wave at National Hockey League games, according to Wikipedia.

This is not about that kind of wave.

No, I’m talking about your ordinary wave using a hand, ideally. I guess the reason this interests me is that I live in the country, where people wave a lot.

I’ve noticed during my trips to town that city dwellers not only don’t wave at all, but seem surprised and somewhat disconcerted by a stranger waving at them. They’d never feel at home in a rural area, where waving has a somewhat elaborate set of rules most of us take for granted. I’ll try to explain the basics for the benefit of any “townies” who are reading this.

First, the basic wave. When you see an approaching car or person, get ready to put your hand in the air, cupping it slightly and moving it back and forth briefly. However, don’t perform this maneuver too early, or the recipient will think of you as “uppity,” simply getting the requisite wave out of the way as soon as possible. By the same token, don’t wave too late when they’re almost by your location, or you risk being seen as absent-minded if they see your wave, or — even worse — rude if they don’t. If the person is on a horse, a quick salute is always in good taste.

Be sure you don’t cup your hand too deeply, or there’s a chance you’ll be seen as a potential Miss America candidate. You also don’t want your hand completely flat, or they will probably think you want them to stop. This is especially true if you’re not prepared for carrying on a conversation for an indefinite period of time.

Now that you’ve mastered the basics, the wilderness waver can move on to more advanced etiquette. For example, the wave should be more vigorous and exaggerated for those in a larger vehicle such as a tractor compared to someone in a pickup truck. For a person on a bike or on foot, a quick head nod can suffice, particularly if you’re weeding the turnips. If you’re also in a vehicle and the other person or group consists of people you’ve never seen before and never expect to see again, then a quick raising of one or two fingers from the steering wheel is acceptable in lieu of a wave.

This is also true if you pass the same neighbor twice in a short period of time, such as a few hours apart. However, if they’re doing different chores (hauling livestock one trip, hay the next), then you’re expected to wave again. If they have merely changed feed caps, then a subsequent wave is optional. Unlike the quick head nod by itself, adding a nod to the wave indicates some fondness for the wavee.

Interestingly, when I drive inside the retirement community where my mother lives, the rural rules again seem to apply — i.e., everyone waves at you. Since I’m sure several of the retirees came from city surroundings, perhaps generational as well as geographical considerations are relevant.

Hopefully you get the idea by now, and can at least hold your own if you find yourself in the sticks sometime. But you know, now that I think about it, driving in the city can also produce a wave from some of the others, at times quite energetically. The waving etiquette in town seems much simpler to understand, though, since they generally only use one finger. And here’s a friendly city wave right back at you.