Column: Senior Moments, "Free Time"

For the first time in a long time, I’ve gotten to sit. You’re probably thinking that I sit all the time at school, work or even in my own house. That is correct. I do own chairs. But this is a different kind of sitting. One where my mind is clear, my muscles relax and my only goal is to be still. It’s glorious.

Obviously, this leisure time was short-lived. After just days of free time, the rapids of summer began to wash away most of my new-found relaxation. My summer jobs have filled in my calendar. I’m beginning to accept that my life moves at a fast pace, but I still can’t let go of the joy of relaxation.

When I ponder my time sitting, I realize I loved the free time. I was excited to do whatever I wanted. Maybe I would start playing piano, learn to speak a different language, or make my parents happy and clean my room. I felt as though my time was my choice. I had the freedom to do as I wished.

I know now that this has been the truth my whole life. We are not bound to do things with our time. While our time is free to us by choice, it isn’t free in the sense that it will always cost us something. When we go to work, we choose not to stay home. When we get married, we say “yes” to one person and “no” to every other eligible bachelor or bachelorette in the world. When we go for a run, we choose not to sleep, eat or sit. We can do whatever we choose, but it will always cost us. The real mystery in all of this is what time is actually worth.

With capitalism, when something is free, it’s not worth much. This is because money is better than the item. When it comes to our freedom and our time, no amount of money is comparable. Our coins are not equivalent to our minutes. We all have an unknown amount of time on this earth together. In a world where we can have anything — a car, house or brand-new cat — we all really want the same thing: tomorrow.

So the question begs, if time is a choice we get to use freely, a limited-edition and worth more than anything, what should we do with it? Let’s do this: What if we focused on our quality of time instead of quantity? Find a job that makes you happy. Find friends who matter. Find hobbies that are all worthwhile.

When I feel the most alive, like I’m breathing, rejoicing and being still all at once, I’m giving my time away. Hear me out: Give your time to the people you love. Sit with them. Listen to them. Be with them. Give them the time of day to feel like someone who is important. There is no time like the present, and there isn’t a present like time. This is how we change the world: by spending our time as a gift.

The only thing more important than time is you. You are not repeatable. There are millions of minutes, but there is just one you. So, spend your free time however you’d like. Might I suggest doing everyone a favor: Wake up every day and decide this is the perfect time to just be you.

Erin Urhahn is a 2023 graduate of Oak Ridge High School. She's just a girl trying to find her niche in the world.