Sideline chatter

Today's forecast: another Selig All-Star brainstorm

Commissioner Bud Selig, wanting to build on his brainstorming momentum and inject more meaning into the World Series, is expected to announce today that this year's Series-winning league will henceforth get the final at-bat in next year's All-Star Home Run Derby.

Detour de France

Attention, U.S. Postal Service: We double-checked that motto of yours -- the one about the mail must get through, etc. -- and nowhere among "neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night" did we find any mention of "French protesters."

Look who's talking

British Open champ Ernie Els, to The Guardian of London, on why lugging around the tournament's claret jug makes him nervous: "It comes in a big metal case -- it looks quite ominous. You could think I was traveling around with weapons of mass destruction or something."

Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle, on what's next for Tampa Bay manager Lou Piniella now that he has dyed his hair: "To show that you're never too old to make a fool of yourself, Piniella will also unveil his new tattoo, a red rear end with the saying 'Born to lose my temper.'"

Randy Turner of the Winnipeg Free Press, after Miami defensive end David Bowens tore an ACL in a ladder mishap while changing a light bulb, on how many Dolphins it takes to replenish a fixture: "Two. One to change the bulb, and the other to take his place on the roster."

Syndicated columnist Norman Chad, on baseball using four different polling methods to fill out its All-Star Game rosters: "Frankly, this process sounds like a cross between the 2000 presidential election and spin-the-bottle."

Rolling with the punches

Who says Drew Henson, the Yankees' struggling minor-leaguer, doesn't have any football left in him?

"He can't play," a baseball scout told The Orlando Sentinel. "Wasn't he a dropback quarterback at Michigan?

"Well, he's a rollout third baseman. He can't make a play without taking an extra step or two after he gets to the ball."

Homer Hanky night

Just wondering: Shouldn't the ceremonial first pitch before Game 1 of this year's World Series will be thrown by Hank Blalock?

Running more to the right

News item: ESPN has added talk-show host Rush Limbaugh to its studio lineup for "Sunday NFL Countdown."

Seizing a rare chance to do the second-guessing, NFL offensive coordinators immediately denounced the network's move as conservative play-calling.

-- Dwight Perry