The nesters: How to cope with moving in, or buying together for the first time

Tips to get you through

~BUYING TOGETHER

A house will probably be your biggest purchase as a couple. Real estate agents advise on how to come to a smart decision.

1. Discuss, then look. "What I try to do is get the couple to come in and sit down with me and not worry about what we're going to go see. Let's talk about what you want in a house," says Ken Kiefer, sales executive at Realty Executives of Cape County. "Surprisingly, a couple usually describes a different house."

2. Know what to expect. Ask your real estate agent to explain the process of buying a house, from taking tours to making offers. "A lot of times it's like a roller coaster, and you need to know that up front," says Kiefer. "There will be emotional highs and lows, and you need to be ready. That's all part of finding a home. It's not like the fairy tales -- it's kind of challenging."

3. Stick to your budget. "The first thing you need to do is go to the bank and find out what you can realistically afford, and not go above that," says Darren Ellis, a real estate agent at Century 21 Ashland Realty. "It might be

a downer when you're getting married, but it's real practical." Just because the bank agrees to loan you a certain amount of money doesn't mean you have to use it all, he says -- remember to factor in other expenses, like car payments or going out to dinner.

Read more about buying a home in the Spring 2011 issue of iDO bridal magazine. Pick up a copy at the Southeast Missourian, 301 Broadway in Cape Girardeau.

~MOVING IN: Hubby hanging on to his college dorm furniture? Local furniture dealers offer tips to keep your new abode gender friendly.

When furnishing your first place together, Mike Young, co-owner of Patrick Furniture in Cape Girardeau, suggests starting with the living room and dining room, where you and your guests will spend most of your time.

"A lot of couples start off with hand-me-down furniture or just take what they had when they left home," he says. "They typically start off shopping for new living room furniture -- a sofa with a matching chair and ottoman."

As for the style and color of your new furniture, Young says there are plenty of options to make you and your new hubby feel right at home. If you don't see exactly what you want in the store, remember that some stores have special order capability -- simply find a piece of furniture you like and then choose the fabric and wood to suit your style and budget.

"There are a lot of styles out there that are not gender specific. They're not too frilly or too big and masculine. You can make a lot of compromises,stylewise," says Young. Right now, Young is seeing a lot of solid-color sofas, especially in neutrals and earth tones like taupe and sage.

When it comes to the bedroom, every new couple should start with a good foundation.

"The most important piece of furniture in your house is the mattress. You sleep for a third of your life, so comfort is very important," says Chris Hutson, co-owner of Hutson's Fine Furniture in Cape Girardeau. There are tons of mattress options out there, and Hutson says the best way to find one is to spend time lying on the beds, feeling the differences among them, and deciding what works for you.

Shopping for furniture might even be a great bonding activity for you and your spouse. John Stephens, manager of Slumberland Furniture in Cape Girardeau, says his No. 1 shopping tip for new couples is to do it together.

"A lot of times we have one partner come in shopping by themselves, and they have a hard time making a decision," says Stephens. "If both partners are involved, it saves a lot of time."