Lessons from parenting

As Oct. 16 nears and my baby officially becomes a 2-year-old, I have realized that parenting is hard and sometimes you make mistakes. This may come as a shock to some of my more loyal readers and my husband, but I am not perfect! Looking back over this past year, I see three big mistakes that I have made that will probably make year two a lot harder than year one.

Mistake No. 1: When Cooper falls and hits his head or bruises another part of his body, we wanted to teach him to be self-sufficient and not to cry or make a big deal out of it. So instead of coddling him and making a fuss over a bumped head, we would "hit" the thing that hit him and say, "No! Bad (enter in adamant object here)!"

Well, that turned around and bit me in the butt, to say the least. The first time Cooper got a real spanking for misbehaving, he turned right around and said "No! Bad Mommy!" and proceeded to spank me back. Apparently he quickly learned the lesson we didn't mean to teach: If it hurts you, hurt it back. I can already see this as a problem the first time another kid hits him at daycare or school, whether it be accidental or not. Now we say, "No! Hitting is bad, kisses are good." This may not be the best, either, because again, when he gets a spanking he yells, "No, Mommy! Pankin' bad!" and then proceeds to still hit back. We have moved on to time out. Hopefully that will go better!

Mistake No. 2: Not having a strict sleep and waking schedule. We tried to get Coop on the same schedule everywhere, but with three different babysitters and mommy and daddy, nothing quite stuck. At the babysitter's house he naps at 12:30 p.m. on the dot, for two straight hours. With grandma it is somewhere around 1 p.m., and about an hour and a half. With daddy it is whenever he remembers a 2-year-old still needs a nap, and it can last from one to two and a half hours.

Bedtime is worse. We started out going to bed at 8 p.m., but with Max's work schedule never set, he was sad he didn't ever get to see Coop. So we pushed bedtime back to 8:30 p.m. and now it is even 9 p.m., depending on when daddy gets home. Because of this, Cooper is like a mini 16-year-old trying to avoid getting out of bed in the morning. He fights it and complains and even hides under the covers. I have already decided that no matter what, the next one has a set sleep schedule, no if's, and's or but's!

Mistake No. 3: Clapping and cheering for everything he does. We all wanted to encourage him and he was just so darn cute learning to walk, run and talk -- we wanted him to know he was great and to keep on trying new things. Because he had his own cheerleaders wherever he went, he now expects applause for everything he does.

When he cleans his toys up, he looks at us with this, "Umm, I'm awesome, why aren't you clapping?" look until we praise him. He only likes to eat if we say, "Good job!" after each bite. And when he is playing, he will boss us around and tell us we aren't doing it right unless we clap after he knocks down each tower we have built.

I'm sure there are many, many, many more things that we have done wrong as first-time parents, and even though I have the above list, I am sure that we will somehow screw up the next kid, too. It's all a part of being a parent. At least Coop will grow up with some pizazz and no one will ever be able to say that my baby is boring!

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Kristen Pind, a native of small-town Gower, Mo., came to Southeast Missouri State University with big dreams of being the next Katie Couric or Diane Sawyer. She never thought that by age 25, she'd be married with a baby and living in Cape Girardeau. Keep up with Kristen's adventures as a first-time mom -- one who's still a girl trying to figure out how her own life fits together. Turns out, she's living a dream she never knew she had, and loving every minute of it. Kristen invites moms of all types to find her "Baby Steps" page on Facebook.