Going the Way of the Dodo

Most of you know the story of the dodo bird, a very large (30 to 50 pounds!), flightless bird which went extinct a long time ago. Found on the island of Mauritius, east of Madagascar in the Indian Ocean, it’s one of the most well-known examples of human-induced extermination.

Dutch sailors landing on the island found the dodos extremely easy to catch, particularly since they had no fear of humans. The sailors ate the birds to extinction in something under 100 years, so that by the late 1600s, the birds were all gone.

When I was reading about the dodo, one source said, “It serves as a symbol of obsolescence with respect to human technological progress.” That’s when I realized I am now a dodo bird.

R.W. Weeks

Yes, the current emphasis on technological gadgetry, particularly things like the Internet, has left me behind. You see, my face isn’t on Facebook, and I don’t tweet on Twitter, bother to blog or Instagram instantly. I still read the newspaper and listen to the radio, for goodness sake! Not seeing any need for keeping up with everyone I know and more on an hourly (or less) basis, I’ve never been particularly interested.

Oh, I do have a “smart” phone, which I use to call people occasionally and to text. Texting makes me feel terribly modern, by the way, so I don’t have any desire to delve deeper into the dastardly devices. My phone actually talked to me once — I’m not sure why — and I nearly threw it into the toilet! Not being on a first-name basis with Siri or Alexa, I let the matter, like the phone, drop. I feel certain the devil was involved.

I’m sure my phone does other things I don’t know about, especially when I’m asleep. Everyone of every age seems to be addicted to their devices, making me wonder what the fascination might be. It reminds me of the story about a noodle shop in China, which was doing way more business than all the other, very similar shops in the neighborhood. The officials finally got suspicious, and upon investigating, discovered the popular proprietors were putting poppies in the pu-pu platter! Their “can’t say no noodles” were all the rage! Which makes me wonder what Apple’s putting into those iPhones. It probably ain’t applesauce.

Besides the techno revolution, other things make me feel like an extinct avian. For example, the Boy Scouts are no longer all boys, and I’m pretty sure the Girl Scouts are being similarly invaded. I’m sorry, but that’s just not right. (Raise your hand if you agree with me — I thought so!)

And I’m certainly not ready for driverless cars and never will be. I’ve written about this previously (“Baby You Can’t Drive My Car”), by the way. When I bought my current vehicle, I assured the salesman I did NOT want it to be my close friend. Also, I won’t be joining anyone on an excursion to outer space, even if they’re expected to come back.

However, I plan on soldiering on despite my feelings of impending extinction. Maybe I can learn a little more about what my phone and other computers can do, although I’m not planning on any lengthy conversations. I did use the Internet to look up some of my dodo bird facts, so that’s something. Which reminds me: my travel agent just called, and she has my one-way tickets to Mauritius ready. I understand it’s a tax haven these days, which is a bonus. I won’t be flying.