MISSOURIANA

Gov. Bill Clinton claims he has created new employment opportunities in Washington and he's right. There are scores of reporters working in the state right now trying to dig up his past.

---

Be a good citizen and get involved in politics: write your legislator whether you favor designating square dancing as Missouri's Official Folk Dance.

---

Americans won't really enjoy politics until the candidates begin discussing subjects that are really important, like improved TV programming and tomorrow's weather.

---

The largest employer in Missouri is now McDonald's hamburger stands. Maybe we need to change the state's official slogan to: "Would you like fries with that?"

---

President Bush's press spokesman, Marlin Fitzwater, calls reporters "lazy." Who does he think he is, the prime minister of Japan?

---

Beware of candidates who promise to cut taxes. They'll lie about other things too.