MISSOURI WATCH: HOW TO FATHOM THE PUBLIC'S MOOD

The unending quest of politicians ensconced in city halls, statehouses and the federal capital is first determining and then understanding something called the "public mood." Freely translated, this mood that takes possession of the minds and souls of America's average citizens is the most compelling force in government, and the success of every politician depends on correctly reading and translating it into aggressive action.

Last November's Republican putsch of Congress has been widely explained as that party's accurate reading of the public mood, which the Democrats seemingly were either too dumb to read or too arrogant to respond to. Congressman Mel Hancock's attempt to restrict new state taxes, offered as a constitutional amendment last year, was touted as an accurate reflection of the public mood, although its overwhelming defeat led to the conclusion that Mel was a better appliance salesman than mood prognosticator.

Gov. Carnahan, who opposed the Hancock amendment, decided after its decisive defeat that its sponsor had caught the public's spirit but had failed to interpret it correctly. In concert with the sponsors of the first Hancock amendment, the Missouri Farm Bureau, Carnahan will offer his assessment of tax limitation, which calls for public approval of tax measures that reach the multimillion-dollar threshold. The governor believes the public is only worried about big increases and doesn't want to be worried about tax hikes that are small, even if an accumulation of them reaches a few multimillion dollars. We probably won't have confirmation or rejection of this mood assessment for another 18 months, at which time the public may be in another mood.

As you can see, reading the public's mood is not only vital to our leaders' political health, it is equally essential to make the correct assessment at the proper time. Some of us are liable to forget that Bill Clinton's victory in November 1992 was successful because the Arkansan accurately sensed the public's mood, which it seems to me was that most voters were tired of listening to George Bush. It's amazing how many of us grew to dislike Bill's voice so quickly after tiring of George's dialogue.

After correctly diagnosing the public mood, the GOP minority in Congress wisely decided to insert the voice of Newt Gingrich for those of Tom Foley and George Mitchell. Newton's manner of speech, which was strangely similar to that of Rush Limbaugh, was a refreshing change of pace from the likes of Foley and Mitchell, whose voices didn't seem to yield a clue as to what the public was thinking. Thus, there follows the first amendment to the proper assessment rule, namely that the thinking of John Q. and Mary Public must be announced in a firm, vigorous tone of voice, as if the speaker knows exactly what America was thinking, even if he doesn't have a clue.

Having arrived at the conclusion of today's lesson on how to govern properly, and it is safe to conclude that the first, and only, rule of political success can be summarized thusly: It is imperative to read the public's feelings and translate these desires into action in the most forceful voice possible.

Once you know the essentials, the rest is easy, since anyone with half a mind can read the public's mood, which with half a mind I will forthwith list:

1. The public's mood calls for annual tax reductions at the municipal, county, state and federal levels.

2. The public also wants improved services at all levels, with home delivery of these services preferred.

3. We citizens want all existing services that are currently denied us provided without further delay, and a letter of apology from the responsible officials would be nice.

4. We would like for all politicians who personally irritate us to be removed from office as quickly as possible.

5. Rather than worry with details about improved governmental services, we prefer not to be bothered with details, particularly if these require a few moments of study and a smattering of accurate information.

6. We prefer that any changes in our public mood be accurately interpreted for immediate implementation.

Unfortunately you couldn't hear the tone of my voice as I wrote these demands, but I say in all modesty, I sounded just like Bob Dole.

~Jack Stapleton is a Kennett columnist who keeps tabs on state government in Jefferson City.