LETTERS TO THE EDITOR: `SANCTIMONIOUS, SMUG, BIGOTED, UNINFORMED BUSY-BODIES'

Dear Editor:

I just read a letter in this section from a Margaret Walker of Cape Girardeau, who, judging from her letter (May 10), seems to be of a type that this country produces a lot of: Sanctimonious, smug, bigoted, uninformed busy-bodies. I'm a person who fights evil wherever he sees it, and I consider this lady and her type to be a major threat.

"Do you now anyone who has died from second-hand smoke?"

In my view, the problem is not second-hand smoke. The problem is that second-hand smoke is laughably misnamed: When a smoker parks his/her carcass beside me and lights up, I, a non-smoker, finds that most of the smoke that I get is first-hand. Why do I say this? Because for about 80 percent of the life of the cigarette, it is not being puffed upon; it is dangling at the end of the smoker's arm far enough away from the smoker's face that he/she doesn't get the "benefit" of that 80 percent -- but I do. In a well-ventilated space the effects of true second-hand smoke are comparatively insignificant. I wish I could say the same about first-hand smoke.

"... crime ... like Bill Clinton allowing doctors to abort babies."

Bill Clinton couldn't stop doctors from aborting babies, even if he wanted to. If 12 years of Reagan and Bush doing their dead-level best to suck up to the religious Right on this issue, and still not being able to suppress abortion, doesn't convince Walker of this, what would?

"Joycelyn Elders ... says that churches should provide marriages to homosexuals."

Lots of people say lots of words about lots of things. I think that Walker should not be concerned about Elders' words on that subject, since, to my best knowledge, Elders is not in a position to make policy in any church.

"Two men marrying or two women, that is not marriage and never can be according to God."

At one time I opposed the idea of homosexual unions for no reason in particular, except that it seemed, er, untraditional. I was brought up in the belief that the primary purpose of marriage is so that society can force upon fathers the responsibility of providing for their children. I agreed with that and still do. Marriage has a second desirable side effect. It encourages faithfulness to one's spouse -- and, when the vows are adhered to, practically guarantees that the married partners are at only minimal risk of getting sexually-transmitted diseases. Aside from the emotional bonds that, I do not doubt, homosexuals also would feel in such an arrangement, it cannot be denied that there is a certain public health benefit to be realized in encouraging homosexuals not to be promiscuous. If Elders' words had any purpose, that must have been it. As to God's position on the subject, all I can say is: If one doesn't believe in God, then it really doesn't matter to one, does it? To me, what homosexuals do behind closed doors is sort of like what they say about the manufacture of sausage: Sensitive adults, I in particular, shouldn't have to see it. But more important than that, it simply is not Walker's (nor my) business.

"They crucified Jimmy Swaggart. He humbled himself and asked for forgiveness."

Too bloody well right he did! As who would not when one's lucrative scam is about to slip through one's fingers? I hate to shock Walker like this, but Jimmy Swaggart was a slightly off-color movie comedy just waiting to be made. Walker may have already forgiven Swaggart, but if God has the good sense that He is credited with, He won't. After all, Swaggart for all these years has set himself up as the arbiter of moral behavior for all of his sheep-like (they revel in that word, do they not?) followers, and teachers should be held to a higher standard than their pupils, should they not?

DONN S. MILLER

Tamms, Ill.