CARING FOR OUR CHILDREN REMAINS ONGOING HONOR

As we near the end of the 20th century and consider the technological marvels that have highlighted these 100 years, we can look with some shame on the continued erosion of one institution we should highly prize: the family unit.

Many of society's problems behavioral, psychological, criminal can be traced to the breakdown of families. While the results of this problem are certainly in the public domain, the solutions cannot be legislated or dealt with collectively. On this Father's Day, it serves us well not just to give and accept gifts of the holiday, but to understand the value each family plays in a larger, societal perspective.

On this day designed to honor fathers, it is sad to note the paternal damage that is possible. It is no stretch to link the poverty of some of the nation's children to fathers who disavow their financial commitments. According to Dr. Louis W. Sullivan, secretary of the Department of Health and Human Services, a third of absentee fathers fail to provide obligatory support payments. The human and societal cost aside, the American financial sacrifice of the trend of unwed teen births has been estimated at nearly $22 billion; most public expenditures through AFDC and food stamps are to families that start with teen pregnancies.

Add to that the burden society must bear in substituting the nurturing responsibilities of absentee fathers. Studies indicate that parents spend 40 percent less time with their children than did parents in 1965. Divorce worsens this statistic, as do separation, neglect, abandonment and general parental indifference. While children of poverty certainly suffer from this calamity, the problem cuts across socio-economic lines; no child of any race or financial status is immune from the suffering that comes from emotional deprivation.

In their tender, learning years, children have a remarkable capacity for discovering the love fathers have to offer them ... just as they can ascertain love that is not there. The latter discovery can lead to a harsh society.

We do not lay the problems of American society at the feet of the country's fathers. Nor do we indict single-parent households, which can generate genuine love and provide principled upbringing. What we can attest is that in a nation of 250 million, the cumulative actions of individuals can make a difference. There may be glory only one day a year in being a father, but there is ongoing honor in doing the job well.