Advice to the graduate

"We don’t just need leaders, we need followers."

A friend who’s worked in Washington politics for decades was thinking aloud about a commencement speech she was scheduled to give at her law school alma mater. She didn’t want to give the students fluff. She wanted to be congratulatory while not patronizing them. She wanted to make a point about gratitude, stewardship and humility.

Jerry Seinfeld took a similar tack in his comedic way while speaking at Duke University’s commencement this year.

"Privilege is a word that has taken quite a beating lately," he said. "Privilege today seems to be the worst thing you can have. I would like to take a moment to defend it."

After making a few jokes, he noted that he "grew up a Jewish boy from New York. That is a privilege if you want to be a comedian."

Seinfeld went on, telling the students: "You went to Duke. That is an unbelievable privilege. ... My point is we’re embarrassed about things we should be proud of and proud of things that we should be embarrassed about."

At the University of Mary in Bismarck, North Dakota, a single mom graduated this year, with her baby close beside her. It’s a traditional Catholic school that has vowed to support students who are pregnant and need help. The college is inspired by Mother Teresa, who would say, essentially: Bring me your child. You do not have to abort her.

When I encountered Mother Teresa in my student years an undergraduate at Catholic U, I was surprised by what a humble figure she was -- physically and spiritually. She may have been photographed with Princess Diana and other luminaries, but even when she won the Nobel Peace Prize, for her this august achievement was just an opportunity to remind people about the creator of the universe and how we can share the love that God has for us.

So far, this commencement season, the most controversial address seems to be the one given at a small Catholic college, Benedictine, in Kansas. I’ve spoken there in the past. The press would not have noticed if the speaker wasn’t a Super Bowl champion. I won’t defend everything he said, which included condescending words toward women and a blinkered idea about the value of service and the purpose of prayer, but I will share that the school shows in its policies a particular love for Mary, the mother of God. The president, Steve Minnis, and his wife, Amy, are great examples for the students of the gift of family life. I’m grateful for them and people like them who live their faith as followers, even in leadership.

Gifts. Gratitude. In our culture, keeping focus on these things can be a miracle.

Here’s another quote from a recent commencement speech, this one given by Jonathan Roumie, the actor who portrays Jesus in the television show "The Chosen": "The era we’re living in demands a revolution of deep prayer. One of silence and solitude amidst the din of the world, in order to cultivate a sense of peace and harmony within." Like Seinfeld, he also had some advice regarding what he saw as the students’ duty: "(Y)ou must endeavor to preach the Gospel by the life you live: By your actions and the choices you make; by the political positions you take and advocacy for the causes you champion."

That’s the right idea — for leaders, followers and students of all ages.