NewsJune 30, 2016
‘We cherish every hello’: Being part of a military couple isn’t easy, but love prevails for these local couples
Being in a relationship or marriage can have its ups and downs, especially when that relationship involves the military. From long-distance arrangements to difficulty communicating, military couples face a number of obstacles. Many rise above those obstacles, though, and grow stronger in the process.
Kelsey and Sgt. Dane Gibson
Sgt. Dane Gibson and his wife, Kelsey, met when they were teenagers. Dane worked at West Park Mall at the time, and Kelsey decided to stop and say hi while she was shopping.
“He kind of waved and I stopped in and we talked for a couple hours, and that’s when I kind of knew, ‘OK, well, that’s kind of different.’ You don’t really stop to talk to someone for a couple hours about everything,” she says.
The two eventually began dating, and when Dane graduated from college in 2011, he enlisted in the Army as a combat engineer.
He did basic training at Fort Leonard Wood, Missouri, and then was asked to go to airborne school in Fort Benning, Georgia. He was later stationed in Fort Bragg, North Carolina, as a paratrooper for the 82nd Airborne.
During his time in the Army, Dane was deployed once to Afghanistan for seven and a half months. His platoon was a busy one, and often was away on missions.
“I think it definitely put our relationship through a lot of strain; there were moments where we were like, ‘What are we doing and why are we with this person? Is this really what we want to do?’” Kelsey says. “We definitely questioned it, but I think in the end it brought us closer, because you questioned it when you were apart because it was easy, but when you were together it really made you appreciate what you have and kind of put that in perspective, like, ‘This is why we’re together, this is what it’s all about.’”
Kelsey says several months ago Dane joined the National Guard and was based out of Cape Girardeau, which is convenient considering their families live in the area.
They were married April 2 at Grace United Methodist Church in Cape Girardeau and live in St. Louis. Kelsey is a dietitian at Christian Northeast Hospital and Dane works for Boeing.
Michelle and Sgt. Tony Sandusky
Michelle and Sgt. Tony Sandusky met in seventh grade in Dexter, Missouri. They grew up together, but didn’t begin dating until their senior year of high school.
After graduation, Tony enlisted in the Marines and Michelle went to Southeast Missouri State University, graduating in December with a bachelor’s degree in interior design and a minor in architecture.
Tony is stationed in Camp Pendleton, which is north of San Diego.
Although the couple has been engaged for two years, Michelle’s parents wanted her to finish school before she had a wedding and moved away.
“Communication has become a big deal because all we really have is phone communication, and the time that we get to spend together is just so much more valuable because it’s so limited,” she says.
Michelle says she still gets butterflies every time she’s about to see Tony, and says the long-distance aspect of their relationship has kept the romance alive.
She says although the distance has been a challenge, she feels grateful because not every couple can say they still feel so passionately after knowing a person for so long.
Receive Daily Headlines FREESign up today!
“We cherish every hello, every goodbye is super meaningful, and I really think that’s been something that has just kept everything going between us,” she says.
Tony and Michelle were married May 28 at the River Campus Park in Cape Girardeau.
Tony will be deployed in the fall, but he and Michelle still will be able to communicate regularly. Michelle has a job lined up as a design consultant for Restoration Hardware in Southern California.
“You really have to figure out a communication relationship, basically, because that’s the basis of what we have,” she says.
Tricia and Sgt. David Vaughn
Tricia and Sgt. David Vaughn first met at a birthday party on Feb. 18, 2005. Tricia’s sister introduced them, and they began dating the next month.
They were married Oct. 4, 2007, and two or three weeks later, he enlisted in the Army National Guard. He was stationed in Farmington, Missouri, and is part of the 1138th Engineer Co.
“I always thought about joining the military, but I wanted to wait, so I waited until later in life to join; I thought I would succeed better at it,” David says. “And then support, that makes a big difference. That was the kicker.”
David was deployed to Afghanistan for 11 months in September 2012. Since then he has been called away in other cases, like to help in Ferguson, Missouri, for flood duty, ice duty and other crises.
“He’s been away for multiple holidays and birthdays and anniversaries and stuff, but we just make it work,” Tricia says. “And he and I both have military family members, so that helps a lot, too. We kind of know what to expect on some of this stuff.”
Tricia says keeping busy during his time away helped keep her mind distracted. And she was busy, especially because she works full time and has two children — Abby, age 8, and Logan, 10.
On May 13, 2013, David came home and surprised his children at their school.
“It was a wonderful day, and he brought a flag that all of his platoon signed, and they keep it at Alma Schrader,” Tricia says.
David says a large part of deployment relies on trust, and says if a couple can be apart that long, there aren’t many things that could come between them.
“Be patient … try to be understanding. It’s not easy on them, nor is it easy on the spouse,” Tricia says.
“I think being in the military taught me stability is key to life. I think it made me a better parent,” David says. “Stability, discipline, just knowledge that you get from other soldiers — it’s not all about the Army, it’s who you meet and the knowledge that you take from them, different aspects of life. And when you’re gone, you appreciate it more when you get back.”
David also works at the Cape Girardeau Post Office and Tricia works at SoutheastHEALTH as a registered medical assistant.
Story Tags
Advertisement
Related
Connect with the Southeast Missourian Newsroom:
For corrections to this story or other insights for the editor, click here. To submit a letter to the editor, click here. To learn about the Southeast Missourian’s AI Policy, click here.
Related
NewsDec. 10
Advertisement
Receive Daily Headlines FREESign up today!
