TEEN MOM JUGGLES SCHOOL AND BABY

Today marks the beginning of summer vacation for 17-year-old Amy O'Kelly. But, unlike many of her high school friends, O'Kelly's chief concerns this summer will not be her tan or her Saturday night plans.

She is married and has a 4-month-old son.

O'Kelly, who has just finished her junior year at Cape Girardeau Central High School, is a teen parent hoping to earn her high school diploma next year.

Odds seem to be against her. A committee studying why students drop out of school, cited pregnancy and teen parenting as one of the leading reasons students quit school here.

O'Kelly says she's determined to stay in school and get her high school diploma. But she has discovered it will not be easy.

Last summer, she found out she was pregnant. In August, she was married, and the baby was born in February.

"I was going to get married after I graduated from school," O'Kelly said. "I just kind of rushed things along.

"My family didn't really want me to get married. They said it would be too hard. I did it any way."

Since her son was born, O'Kelly has found that raising a baby, taking care of a home and going to school is a tough job, and can see why others might decide to quit.

"I'm going to come back to school next year," she said with determination. "I want to be an architect. To do that, I've got to go to school."

Her husband dropped out of school in the ninth grade and works full time. He will turn 19 this month. She said he sometimes suggests she quit school, too.

"But my parents don't want me to quit, and I don't want to quit. I'm also going to college," she said. "I want to be an architect real bad."

Next year she is scheduled to take three hours of drafting, two English classes, a government class, a reading class and a writing class.

"I know it will be hard," she said. "But if I am going to be an architect, I have to get an education.

"I also want my dad to be proud of me."

O'Kelly said her friends "didn't think bad things about me because I was pregnant or have a baby."

In fact, she said, many of her friends are also pregnant or teen parents, or they thought being married and having a baby sounded like fun.

"My friends think it's so cool because I'm married and have a baby. It's okay for me, but I don't think they would be able to make it."

And, she said, it's not cool.

"The kids in my classes gripe about having to work and being tired. They don't know what they're talking about. I'm married. I've got a baby. I work and I'm still coming to school. A baby is hard work and now he's teething. He's kind of grouchy.

"I have dishes stacked up for three weeks. I'm trying to take care of the baby, do his laundry and still do my homework."

With all this to worry about, her friends' concerns seem trivial.

"They have no worries. Their daddies buy them cars and buy their clothes. They worry about `Where are we going to go this weekend,' or `What should I wear.'"

O'Kelly said: "I like to go out, too, but we don't have any money and going out takes money. Even if you go someplace that doesn't cost money, it costs gas money.

"I like to cruise Broadway or go to the mall but that's for kids, and we're not kids anymore because we're married and have a baby."

O'Kelly said she moved to Scott City a few years ago with her father and got involved with the wrong group of friends. "That's what messed me up. It's where I met Billy, but it's where I messed up my life."

She believes many teenagers are sexually active.

"It's influence peer pressure," she said. "One person does it, so it's cool, so I've got to do it. If I don't do it, guys will go around talking about me.

"Girls get put on the spot by guys. If they say no, they get called a `tease' or the guys say they had you even if they didn't. Then other guys start asking you. You get hounded and hounded by guys, so you end up doing it."

She said she and her friends know about birth control, but don't always use it.

"All my friends have been going out with their boyfriends for a long time," she said. "It's bound to happen."

She explained that in her case she stopped taking her birth control pills because they were making her sick. "I needed a different kind, but then I got pregnant."

She's not alone.

"One of my friends had a baby. She got married, and she worked nights, so she couldn't keep coming to school. Another of my friends dropped out when she was pregnant. She got married, but now she's divorced."

O'Kelly believes another friend got pregnant because O'Kelly had a baby. Some girls get pregnant deliberately because of the extra attention pregnant girls receive, she said.

Her parents have been supportive, O'Kelly said, although they warned her about the troubles that might lie ahead for her.

"When I first told my mom, she said, `adoption.' I was 16 when I got pregnant. She was 17 when she got pregnant. She said it was a big mistake for her."

Her parents were married young and later divorced.

"I think they're afraid the same thing will happen to me and Billy. But my parents have been real supportive. And everyone loves the baby."

While she hopes to continue attending school, her status as a teen mom has damaged her grade point average.

During the first semester of her junior year, O'Kelly was earning primarily Bs and Cs. "I had one D in typing," she said.

"I have dropped my grades a lot this semester," she said. "I had a B in English. Now I have a D. Before, I was just pregnant. Now I have a baby crying and I've got to watch him so he doesn't hurt himself.

"I have a husband and a baby. It makes it hard to study."

But she is determined to continue her education.

She says education is important for her and her son. "He is not quitting," she said. "He doesn't have to go to college if he doesn't want to. But he is going to graduate from high school. You have to graduate or you can't get a job."