Memories and pain linger for KC families

KANSAS CITY, Mo. -- The cleanup and recovery efforts at ground zero may be complete, but feelings of hurt and loss will linger for Missouri and Kansas families whose loved ones died in the World Trade Center attacks.

"The one thing I'm thankful for is I do have, I did have, a body. I at least had that closure," said Tammy Drake of Lee's Summit. Her husband, Randy, was struck by falling debris.

The remains of more than 1,700 other victims, however, have not been recovered or have not been identified.

Among them is Bill Caspar, 57, who grew up near Junction City, Kan.

"I imagine this will probably go on the rest of my life. It's always there, and you just have to work past it," said his brother Charles Caspar Jr., who still lives on the family farm in Geary County, Kan. "It's hard to lose your brother."

In Southwest Missouri, Lucille Willett thinks every day of her son, John, who grew up in Independence and earned a master's degree from the University of Missouri-Kansas City.

"We still have his belongings, his pictures and stuff we'd never get rid of," said the Walnut Shade resident. "Everything that was John is still here -- his degrees, his bachelor's degree, his master's degree. But they're just a piece of paper."

'It will never be over'

She and her husband, Ron, are trying to get on with their lives the best they can. But "it will never be over for us as long as we live," she said.

Officials in New York have not yet identified any remains of John Willett. Caspar and Willett were working on upper floors of the north tower when the plane struck, Caspar for Marsh & McLennan and Willett for CO2e.com.

Julie Geis, 44, of Lee's Summit, who was at a job training session at the World Trade Center that day, also died on one of the top floors. Her family held a memorial service last fall, but had no body to bury.

Officials confirmed the death of Denease Conley, 44, a former Kansas City resident, who worked as a security guard at the twin towers.

The pain of losing John Willett has been magnified for his father because there are no remains to bury.

"I don't know how to explain that void," Ron Willett said. "I talked to him Monday night on the telephone. The next day, he vanished from the face of the earth. Nothing. That has an impact."

The Caspar family buried a lock of Caspar's hair they found in his New Jersey apartment.

Tammy Drake said she doesn't pay much attention to news coverage of the attacks these days.

"I don't turn on the TV much. When they talk about it, it brings it back to the surface It makes it harder to get through the day," she said.