LOCAL SCHOOLS COMBAT BULLYING

There is no cure for the schoolyard bully, but local educators are working to lessen the effects of his or her abuses by increasing the presence of adults around students and teaching tolerance in classrooms.

Bullying -- the act of deliberately harming another child by taunting, assaulting or otherwise hurtful behavior -- is not new. It has gained attention in recent years since victims of bullying have become aggressors in school shootings like that which occurred at Santee, Calif.'s Santana High School Monday.

Cape Girardeau Clippard Elementary School counselor Debra Rau said some name calling and verbally pointing out another person's differences is normal among children. But when those actions become cruel and victims reach a breaking point, it's gone too far, she said.

"I can't believe this is a trend," Rau said of the school shootings that have involved victims of bullying. "I have to believe that there is something in these people that's unique, where they just take it and take it and not deal with it appropriately until finally they end up overreacting."

Rau said victims of bullying need a safe outlet for their aggression. Children need to be able to talk with a parent, teacher, principal or other adult who can help resolve the problem, she said.

Tolerance stressed

Local school counselors spend much of their time in classrooms teaching conflict-resolution and anger-management techniques to students. Tolerance of each other's differences is a familiar subject in local schools.

Teachers also are strategically placed throughout hallways and on school grounds to watch for potential problems. And weekly meetings help teachers at the secondary level compare notes about a student who might need help.

"You can see if they're frustrated or whatever," said Kathy Berkbigler, a math teacher at Louis J. Schultz School. "If we get air of it we try to find out who is doing it."

But gone are the days when a teacher or principal would learn of a bullying situation and it was resolved after the aggressor was disciplined. Today, it is equally important to learn the reasons behind the aggressive behavior and to help victims get rid of their frustrations, fear or even anger over the events.

"We've got at least four outlets right here that he or she can come to," said Betty Freeman, Caring Communities site coordinator at Jefferson Elementary School. "At school if students have this problem, it's up to teachers to try and solve it. If they can't do it, we take it to the principal and someone like Caring Communities to get the problem solved."

Freeman said she mediated a problem between a bully and victim earlier this week after a parent requested she intervene. Both children had other, underlying problems that played into their roles as the bully and victim.

Abuse causes bullies

Rau said it is common for children who have problems in their home or who are victims of abuse to become bullies. They seek control through their aggressive behavior, and they find victims in younger children or those who look or act different from others.

"They pick on someone they perceive will not fight back," said Rau. "We all have things that make us unique, but there's something about some people's personalities that may make them a target for bullies."

Rau said it is important that parents are involved with their children and talk with them about their school day and lives in general to prevent them from becoming bullies or victims of bullying.

Helping victims find a voice -- either by going to an adult for help or having a friend do it for them -- is the key to safely resolving a bullying situation, she said.

"Criticisms, pointing out faults, that's just normal, and it's going to happen, but we have to learn how to deal with it appropriately," said Rau. "We know that if our house is on fire we call 911. To kids, those kinds of things are emergencies because it hurts their feelings so bad. They need to know where they can go for help, too.".