Life as a teen parent

"Beep beep beep."

It's 6 a.m., and Ashle Richardson's alarm clock sounds. Like most teenagers, she usually takes a few minutes to get out of bed in the morning. But Richardson can't hit the snooze button too many times because someone needs her attention in the mornings -- her 5-month-old son, Eric.

"I have to get dressed first, while he's still asleep. If not, he starts crying and wants me to pick him up," Richardson said. "I do it backwards. By the time I'm done getting him ready, I'm dirty."

When she's finished dressing both herself and Eric, Richardson holds him up in front of the mirror. She puts their faces together and looks at herself and Eric.

"I like to do this," the 17-year-old said. "I always think, 'This is my baby. He's a part of me.'"

After feeding Eric, who loves bananas and sweet potatoes, Richardson crams down a quick breakfast before she heads out the door. She drops Eric off at day care and makes her way to the Career and Technology Center before the first bell rings at 7:40 a.m.

This is Richardson's final year of high school, and a lot is going on. Her high school's prom is in May, graduation will follow, and then it will be time to plan Eric's first birthday party. Between Eric, school and her part-time job at Ponderosa Steak House, Richardson doesn't have much time to think about those events.

"I seem like I never have time for anything," she said.

Thursday was the final day of school before Central High School's two-week Christmas break. Richardson spent the final day of school playing with a group of 4-to-11-month-old babies at Southeast Missouri State University's Child Enrichment Center. She's enrolled in a Career and Technology Center course that prepares students for employment in child care.

"Next semester Eric will come here for day care," Richardson said as she played with 5-month-old Caiden Burgess.

Although she enjoys playing with the other babies, she misses Eric. "I wish he was here with me now," she said.

Richardson thinks she wants to become a day-care teacher when she graduates from high school, but that plan might change.

Richardson's career goals have changed many times since she was a child. She wanted to be a photographer, then she thought the fashion industry was her calling. She's also considered a child-care profession.

"Since I have my own child, I have a pretty high tolerance for other children," she said. "I thought I wanted to get into a child-care career, but I don't know."

Richardson also is interested in pursuing a cosmetology career. Of course, that might change as she gets older.

She plans to start college in the fall. "I know it takes people with kids a lot longer to finish college, but I will definitely go," she said.

'I was shocked'

Richardson remembers the day she found out she was pregnant. It was in October during her junior year of high school. She is certain her pregnancy occurred when she switched her birth control prescription from pills to the patch.

"I was shocked," Richardson said. "It was scary, hard and I wasn't sure what to do."

She immediately called her boyfriend, who Richardson has known since she was a child.

"When I first told him, he was just as shocked as I was," she said. "He has been very supportive, though."

After Eric was born Richardson's boyfriend had some legal problems and is currently incarcerated. Richardson said the couple plans to stay together and raise Eric. For now, she and Eric live with her mother.

Richardson never told her mother she was pregnant. She wanted to but couldn't work up the courage."I was so scared, and I kept putting it off," she said.

One day, her mother questioned why she quit refilling her birth control patch prescription. "Eventually, she figured it out and asked me," Richardson said. "She was mad at me for a while."

Richardson knows other pregnant teens and teens with children who dropped out of school because of their pregnancies. She knew she had to finish school.

"I was never going to drop out because I like school," she said. "I knew I could get through it as long as I put my mind to it. "

The pregnancy wasn't as bad as Richardson thought it would be. She never experienced much morning sickness."I maybe missed one day of school," she said. "There were days when I'd wake up and wouldn't want to go, but I forced myself to."

Richardson always considered herself a "prissy girl." Unfortunately she found out maternity clothes weren't fashionable.

Walking down the halls at Central High School during her pregnancy, Richardson felt her classmates stare at her. "I just gave up. I didn't care anymore what I looked like. I wore whatever was comfortable," she said. "I didn't care what others thought of me because I knew they were already thinking, 'Oh, she's pregnant.' Why try to please them with what I was wearing?"

School let out for the summer two months before she gave birth to Eric.

"Those last couple of months were the worst. It was so hot, and I couldn't do anything," she said. At 9:47 p.m. July 11, Richardson gave birth to an 8-pound, 8-ounce baby boy.

'It's amazing'

She loves being a mom and can't quit taking pictures of her son. She's teaching him baby sign language and can't believe how fast he's growing.

"He rolls over and can sit up by himself," she said. "To see him change and evolve -- it's amazing how fast he's growing."

Richardson gained parenting experience from years of baby-sitting her four nieces and nephew, but she knows raising a baby might become more challenging in the future. "I don't know how to potty train him, and I don't want to think about that yet," she said. "I'm glad that's years away."

As a teen mom, Richardson advises her fellow students to practice safe sex. "I'm glad my son is here and I love him. But if I could have waited until my teen life was over before I had a baby, I would have," she said.

Some days Richardson wishes she could be like other teenagers who go out with their friends on the weekends. But when she looks into her son's eyes, the thought of going out quickly disappears. She'd rather be at home, spending time with Eric.

For Christmas, Richardson purchased Eric a blue stocking to hang on the fireplace mantel at her mom's house. Eric's stocking will stick out from the other red and green stockings, but Richardson doesn't mind.

"It's special because he's special," she said.

After all, it was Eric's first Christmas.

jfreeze@semissourian.com

335-6611, extension 246