LEARNING THE AMERICAN WAY: EXCHANGE STUDENT FROM LATVIA GETS A DOSE OF AMERICA

It didn't take Lelde Vaivode long to learn about two of the most important products of American culture: Football and barbecue.

Vaivode, an exchange student at Central High School, is spending a year learning about American culture and the educational system courtesy of Cape Rotary West Club. She's one of three students the club will sponsor for visits to Cape Girardeau this year.

"Part of what they wanted to learn was how cultures differ a little bit, even from one family to the next," said Rotary Club member Ted Coalter, whose family is housing Vaivode for the first portion of her yearlong stay. In all, she will live with three families.

"We try to divide it up so they spend at least one major holiday with each family," Coalter said. "Things can change but to my knowledge, we've never had one that was unhappy with any of the families they've lived with."

Vaivode said she has made a couple of good friends during her stay, but hopes to make more. She is somewhat shy but enjoying the openness of American culture.

"Things are more reserved at home," she said. "We're not open like people are here."

Vaivode said she felt well-prepared for her visit to the Midwest, thanks to e-mail exchanges with the Coalter family and conversations with past exchange students. She has studied English since the second grade and believes she's been able to manage conversations, even Southeast Missouri-style, very well.

"I've met Americans before so I just kinda knew," she said. "In school we spoke British English so this is a little different, but it hasn't been very hard."

The weather that greeted her in mid-August was another story. Temperatures in Latvia are moderate and don't include the high humidity that is common in Cape Girardeau. Debbie Coalter, Ted Coalter's wife, said Vaivode had a difficult time adjusting to the combination of elevated temperatures and high humidity.

"When she came in mid-August, it was so hot it almost made her sick at her stomach," Debbie Coalter said. "I think it's been an adjustment, but she seems to be enjoying it."

Vaivode said life in Cape Girardeau has differed from her experiences back home. The only child was raised by her mother and grandparents in a small town of 6,000 about 40 miles from Riga, Latvia's capital city. She spent her school days with the same group of students in each class period. School sports were not emphasized.

"We don't have lockers at home, and the books, we don't have such big books there," she said. "I do miss my family. Somebody told me my mother must be very brave."

Debbie Coalter said her family has tried to include Vaivode in family activities. She's watched football games surrounded by a roomful of screaming men and attended high school games whenever possible, she said. The Coalter's son and daughter, who live away from home while attending college in town at Southeast Missouri State University, also provide good-natured ribbing to let her know what it's like to have siblings.

And then there is Winston, the Coalter's Yorkshire terrier who demands attention in a way a cat never would, said Debbie Coalter.

"I think she likes him and loves him a little bit, but he's also annoying," she said. "She's told me that her cat was never very affectionate, and Winston demands to be the center of attention."

The Coalters have nothing but respect for Vaivode, who must make up the year in school when she returns home. The vast differences in family life could have been devastating for Vaivode, but she has adjusted well and will benefit greatly from her experience, they said.

"I can't believe this little girl. She flew halfway across the world and had never flown before. That says a lot for someone that wants to take that much on," Debbie Coalter said.

Ted Coalter said he will miss Vaivode when she leaves because "it's like having another child in your family." He said the experience is just as good for the host family as it is for the exchange student.

"One reason I agreed to do it is because I had heard about the experiences of others," he said. "The advice I'd like to give to people considering it is it's a wonderful experience. The relationships are on-going."