Hours that change lives

Seven-year-old Harlie loves having two big sisters.

Destiny Dirnberger and Breena Green aren't really her sisters. They are two outgoing Notre Dame Regional High School seniors who serve as mentors for the Jefferson Elementary School second-grader in an after-school program run by Big Brothers Big Sisters of Eastern Missouri in Cape Girardeau.

Dirnberger and Green typically trade off visiting Harlie in the after-school program.

"It is neat to have a friend who isn't close to my age," Dirnberger said as she and Harlie played a game with wooden blocks Wednesday afternoon in the Jefferson Elementary cafeteria.

Green showed up near the end of the afternoon of activities, having just completed her cheerleading duty.

Despite the age difference, Harlie and her mentors have points in common. "Me and her like coffee," Harlie said of Dirnberger, her face erupting into a broad grin. Green said she and Dirnberger and Harlie share a love of Hello Kitty merchandise.

Their interaction was repeated countless times Wednesday afternoon as mentors played one-on-one board games in the school cafeteria and participated in a game of musical chairs.

The Big Brothers Big Sisters office in Cape Girardeau directs the after-school program that places volunteer mentors with students at Jefferson, Clippard, Blanchard and Franklin elementary schools and at Central Middle School.

The after-school program began in 2001. By the end of that year, 66 students were being mentored. Last year, the program served 232 children, Barnett said, and it currently serves 150 students.

By the end of this calendar year, Big Brothers Big Sisters hopes to have provided mentors for 270 children, based on growing interest in the program by students and volunteers, Big Brothers Big Sisters officials said.

Big Brothers Big Sisters would like to expand the program to neighboring school districts in Cape Girardeau County and in Scott City. School officials in those districts would first have to approve it, and no such agreements are on the table yet.

Most of the 151 mentors are high school and college students, Barnett said. Volunteers spend three to five hours with the children over the course of two after-school visits each month during the school year. Big Brothers Big Sisters also holds several group activities over the summer that mentors and their students can attend. Last summer, the events included swimming and bowling parties.

Harlie, 7, anticipated the block tower falling as her mentor, Destiny Dirnberger, took her turn during the Big Brothers Big Sisters time after school Wednesday. The pairs meet once a week for about an hour and a half.

Jefferson Elementary School has the most participants with about 60 students in the after-school program.

The children receive a snack as part of the mentor program. Activities range from arts and crafts to information about dental hygiene and how to budget their money. "We have had people from the Humane Society talking about taking care of pets," Barnett said.

School officials say the program benefits the students.

"The kids look forward to it. They love it," said Jefferson principal Mark Cook. It's good for children to spend time with responsible adults and high school students, he said.

Typically in the Cape Girardeau School District, there are more students wanting mentors than there are available mentors, Barnett said. In all, 56 children -- 10 girls and 46 boys -- were on the waiting list last week. The numbers fluctuate as mentors are found and children move on or off the list.

'It's about their presence'

While the goal is for mentors to participate in the program through a school year, some have been mentoring the same student for several years.

That doesn't mean all of that time has to be elaborately planned.

Mentors make a difference just by showing up, Barnett said. Children learn they can count on their mentors to visit them after school and take an interest in their lives.

"It's about their presence," she said.

Ellen Carlson, who raises money for Big Brothers Big Sisters as regional director of development, said the one-on-one visits help children develop trust in other people. That's important because many of the children have had their trust broken, she said.

The goal of the mentor program is to help children have academic success, provide them with a safe after-school environment and help them stay out of trouble, Carlson said.

"We want them to grow up and be a productive part of the work force," she said.

The national Big Brothers Big Sisters organization says research shows that mentors can make a difference in the lives of children. A study of children served by Big Brothers and Big Sisters in eight major cities in the early 1990s found that the students were:

• 46 percent less likely to begin using illegal drugs
• 27 percent less likely to begin using alcohol
• 52 percent less likely to skip school
• 37 percent less likely to skip a class
• A third less likely to hit someone
• Able to get along better with their families

An evaluation in 2006 of the local program found that mentored students showed improvement in self-confidence, academic performance, classroom behavior and their ability to express feelings, Carlson said.

Big Brothers Big Sisters says it costs about $1,000 to match a mentor and a child. That includes the cost of recruiting volunteers and screening them. The organization does criminal background checks, interviews the prospective mentors and obtains references. In addition, staff members do a background check to determine if there have been any incidents of child abuse or neglect associated with the prospective mentor.

"When you talk to parents on the phone, one of the first questions asked is 'Are your people safe?'" Carlson said.

Children can only participate in the program with written parental permission and submission of an application form. Big Brother Big Sisters staff members then interview the children to learn more about their interests. The goal is to provide a better match between students and mentors.

"We do our best to make sure they are going to click," Barnett said.

mbliss@semissourian.com

335-6611, extension 123