HEFTY PENSIONS AWAIT MISSOURI'S FEDERAL LAWMAKERS

If you are a voter who has been angry about perks members of Congress bestow on themselves, then get ready for a real tantrum.

Such perks as free parking, subsidized meals and free haircuts are mere chicken feed to the millions of pension dollars that will be raked in once they retire.

Consider this statistic: Seven Missourians serving in Congress are eligible for pensions totaling $15,298,118 once they retire or are defeated, provided they live as long as the nation's insurance companies say is average.

Two of the seven are retiring from office at the end of this year. Sen. John Danforth will become eligible for an annual pension of $53,289. And if he reaches his life expectancy, he will collect a total of $2,142,114 in taxpayer-subsidized pensions.

U.S. Rep. Alan Wheat, leaving his job in the House of Representatives to seek Danforth's job in the Senate, is eligible for an annual pension of $48,791, or $1,533,771 during his expected lifetime, if he fails to return to Congress by winning in November.

The Missourian with the highest lifetime pension potential is 8th District U.S. Rep. Bill Emerson of Cape Girardeau, who qualifies for a retirement pension each year of $66,837 and has a potential, with normal life expectancy, of collecting $3,007,441 in pension.

The Missourian with the biggest annual pension potential is 9th District U.S. Rep. Harold Volkmer of Hannibal, who could draw $80,430 for 12 months in retirement and is eligible for lifetime payments of $1,789,152.

Missourians who no longer serve in Congress but arrived in Washington when the pension increases were installed also fare very well under the present system. Former 6th District congressman Tom Coleman, who was defeated in 1992 by Pat Danner, receives a healthy annual pension payment of $44,973 and will get an expected $1,547,544 in lifetime checks if he lives as long as insurance company actuaries predict.

Both Danner and Jim Talent of the 2nd Congressional District in the St. Louis area are still serving their freshman term and would receive relatively small pension checks for just two years in Congress. Both are expected to win re-election this year, however, and will see their pension potentials increase rapidly.

Despite scandals that have rocked Congress in recent years, the magnitude of the pensions they have voted themselves outweighs any other perk. For example, seven of the eight retiring U.S. senators this year, including Danforth, could live to collect well over $1 million each from their pensions alone. Senate Majority Leader George Mitchell leads the pack of senatorial retirees with a first year pension benefit of more than $84,500, while Michigan Sen. Don Riegle, because of his current age and service, tops the list of departing senators in accumulated lifetime benefits of more than $3.6 million.

There are numerous options for each member's particular situation. For example, Mitchell could choose a spouse survivor annuity that reduces his initial pension so his much younger wife-to-be may continue to collect it after he dies. Based on expectancies, Mitchell and his surviving wife could collect as much as $7.9 million.

Congressional pensions, according to a spokesman of the National Taxpayers Union in Washington, are typically two to three times more generous than those in the private sector. Not only are they initially higher, but tax-funded pensions are protected from inflation with cost-of-living adjustments, which are offered by less than 10 percent of private sector systems. Also, members of Congress enjoy a much lower retirement age with full benefits than either private sector employees or Social Security beneficiaries. Depending on length of service, members of Congress can start drawing pension benefits as early as age 50.

Members of Congress pay up to 8 percent of their salaries into the Civil Service Retirement System, which includes the congressional benefit system. But taxpayers still cover up to 80 percent of the total lifetime pension payout.

A former member of Congress, Hastings Keith, retired in 1973 and has already received $1.2 million from the government. If he lives another eight years, will receive an additional $1 million, while paying less than $50,000 toward these benefits. Keith, a conservative Republican, was critical of the pension system during his tenure in the House. He could have opted not to participate in the system but chose to do so despite his public denunciation of the congressional gravy train.

According to one Washington source, the Civil Service Retirement System, which provides congressional and many other government pensions, has an unfunded liability of more than $500 billion that eventually must be covered by taxpayers.