Breaking the chains of addiction

High school slipped by in a blur. Family fell to the side. Life took a back seat.

Sleep was not an option. Paranoia was a companion. Mood swings, rotten teeth, extreme weight loss and poor memory didn't matter.

Bryan Overbey and Sean Qualls thought they were in control of their lives.

Instead, meth ruled their worlds.

"I stopped doing other drugs because I didn't want it to affect how meth was making me feel," said 21-year-old Overbey, who was born and raised in Indiana. It didn't matter that he barely passed high school and dropped out of college.

He stayed awake for so long that the days ran together. "I was so burned out that I thought every day was Tuesday," he said.

Qualls, 34, managed to hold steady construction jobs in his home state of Arkansas. It didn't matter that he burned his way through two marriages while living for cocaine and meth since he was 15 years old.

"That's the thing about meth, is that you can get into it quick and you don't know what you're getting into," he said.

Both men had failed earlier attempts to recover. Both sold meth to pay for the addiction and to make a living. Both became invincible in their own eyes when they learned how to cook it for themselves.

But the invincibility didn't last.

A few years ago, Qualls was burned when a batch of meth he was cooking caught fire.

"The skin just sloughed off my hands and chest," he said. Three days later, he turned himself into the police and sought medical attention. Now, large white scars cover his chest and arms.

"I just came to the point when I realized that it was going to kill me," Qualls said.

Overbey awoke to the gravity of his addiction while spending six months in jail for cooking meth in a trailer. His mother, who struggled with alcoholism, told him that she had attempted suicide because she couldn't stand that her son also fought addictions, he said.

Qualls and Overbey had reached their turning points. In July 2004, Qualls entered into a 14-month recovery program through Teen Challenge. Overbey joined one month later.

Located in various states, Teen Challenge assists men in recovering from alcohol, drug and other addictions and teaches Biblical principals as tools to redirect their lives. Overbey and Qualls spent the first four months at an induction center, then they transferred to the Cape Girardeau facility for the last 10 months.

Now, Qualls has picked up the pieces of his life and is prepared to function without his addictions. He graduated from the program on Sept. 23 and attends Victory School of Ministry in Arkansas.

Overbey will graduate later this month and plans to join a Teen Challenge youth program in Indiana or find a job and live at a safe center in St. Louis. By next August, he hopes to pursue a sociology or counseling degree in order to help troubled teens.

Methamphetamine is a powerful chemical that cause severe damage to the brain and spinal cord, said Jim Ray, clinical supervisor of the Family Counseling Center Inc. in Cape Girardeau. Doctors and counselors must first determine which symptoms are meth related and which are psychological. Meth users exhibit violent mood swings, hallucinations and paranoia, so meth addiction is often confused with bipolar disorder, major depression and schizophrenia, Ray said.

Some effects of meth withdrawal can clear within days, while others may persist for months or even years.

Since meth releases a lot of dopamine in the brain, resulting in an overwhelming good feeling, coming off of meth is extremely depressing, Ray said. Hallucinations, depression and clumsiness sometimes persist during initial stages of recovery. Patients often pick at their skin, thinking that bugs are crawling underneath.

Overbey went through withdrawal during his first four months in jail, suffering memory loss, incoherent speech, fatigue, vomiting and skin lesions.

"I had sores come up on my skin. I had bumps that I could pop and get nasty," he said. The sores were possibly caused by the toxic chemicals used during cooking meth. Overbey quickly overcame clumsiness, he said, and now mows lawns as part of a team with Teen Challenge.

Targeting psychological effects is the key approach in recovery.

"Typically, coming off of meth is not as life threatening as a lot of other drugs, but the cravings are intense," Ray said. To deal with the cravings, counselors focus on stress management and ways to stay busy.

During recovery, Qualls suffered fatigue for about a week. He understands his body's craving for meth, so he prefers to work in vocational or ministry jobs rather than as a counselor for drug addiction.

"If I entertain the thoughts, I find myself still wanting to do it," he said.

Overbey feels that God played a role in controlling his cravings. He now has confidence to work among teens who are exposed to drugs.

He said, "That's what God did for me, is change my desires. I don't want to do meth anymore."

jmetelski@semissourian.com