Speak Out: Funny Friday - TSA Wants To Improve "Service"

Posted by Lumpy on Fri, May 25, 2012, at 9:32 AM:

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/tsa-under-fire-wants-upgrade-225400114.html

"The TSA does routinely have its successes. Last week alone, officers found 30 loaded guns in passenger carry-on bags. There were seven drug busts as a result of imaging technology, with contraband hidden on bodies and in clothing. One passenger was caught with a tube of toothpaste in her groin area, placed there after officers told her she couldn't bring the tube through."

Victim disarmament, fighting the failed war on drugs, and finding deadly toothpaste are considered "successes" in The Land Of a Thousand Checkpoints.

Replies (11)

  • Something real that the TSA can brag about is the fact that they have replaced the IRS as the most hated federal government agency.

    -- Posted by Lumpy on Fri, May 25, 2012, at 5:06 PM
  • Hope this isn't out of place on this thread, but here goes.

    The Sensitive Man

    A woman meets a man in a bar.

    They talk; they connect; they end up leaving together..

    They get back to his place, and as he shows her around his apartment, she notices that one wall of his bedroom is completely filled with soft, sweet, cuddly teddy bears.

    There are three shelves in the bedroom, with hundreds and hundreds of cute, cuddly teddy bears carefully placed in rows, covering the entire wall!

    It was obvious that he had taken quite some time to lovingly arrange them and she was immediately touched by the amount of thought he had put into organizing the display.

    There were small bears all along the bottom shelf, medium-sized bears covering the length of the middle shelf, and huge, enormous bears running all the way along the top shelf.

    She found it strange for an obviously masculine guy yo have such a large collection of Teddy Bears. She is quite impressed by his sensitive side, but doesn't mention this to him.

    They share a bottle of wine and continue talking and after awhile, she finds herself thinking, 'Oh my God! Maybe, this guy could be the one! Maybe he could be the future father of my children?'

    She turns to him and kisses him lightly on the lips, he responds warmly.

    They continue to kiss, the passion builds, and he romantically lifts her in his arms and carries her into his bedroom where they rip off each other's clothes and make hot, steamy love.

    She is so overwhelmed that she responds with more passion, more creativity, more heat than she has ever known.

    After an intense, explosive night of raw passion with this sensitive guy, they are lying there together in the afterglow.

    The woman rolls over, gently strokes his chest and asks coyly, 'well, how was it?'

    The guy gently smiles at her, strokes her cheek, looks deeply into her eyes, and says: 'Help yourself to any prize from the middle shelf'.

    -- Posted by Have_Wheels_Will_Travel on Sat, May 26, 2012, at 1:22 PM
  • Anything goes in a thread about the TSA Wheels.

    Speaking of which, did you hear the one about the former priest who was defrocked for sex abuse that now works for the TSA? Oh, that has really happened...

    http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-504083_162-57441730-504083/priest-defrocked-for-chil...

    -- Posted by Lumpy on Sat, May 26, 2012, at 7:08 PM
  • Lumpy,

    Sounds like the defrocked priest was a "Sensitive Man" when it came to talking about his past.

    -- Posted by Have_Wheels_Will_Travel on Sat, May 26, 2012, at 7:59 PM
  • Remind me one more time............Exactly what 'service' does TSA provide?

    -- Posted by Robert* on Sat, May 26, 2012, at 10:12 PM
  • TSA saves America from 16yo diabetic, breaks $10K insulin pump which totally could have been a bomb

    http://boingboing.net/2012/05/08/tsa-saves-america-from-16yo-gi.html?utm_source=...

    -- Posted by Lumpy on Tue, May 29, 2012, at 2:48 PM
  • Lumpy, did you read the entire article? Do you know about these pumps? They can easily malfunction. I can't help but wonder about her being hooked up to it in the first place.

    -- Posted by InReply on Tue, May 29, 2012, at 3:07 PM
  • Yeah, I'm sure the TSA agents ultimately did her a huge favor. Wonder who I should write to in order to nominate them for some medals.

    -- Posted by Lumpy on Tue, May 29, 2012, at 4:10 PM
  • Ha!

    -- Posted by Lumpy on Tue, May 29, 2012, at 4:21 PM
  • Something real that the TSA can brag about is the fact that they have replaced the IRS as the most hated federal government agency.

    -- Posted by Lumpy on Fri, May 25, 2012, at 5:06 PM

    That may be a toss up. It's not mandatory to fly.

    -- Posted by We Regret To Inform U on Tue, May 29, 2012, at 8:12 PM
  • -- Posted by We Regret To Inform U on Tue, May 29, 2012, at 9:42 PM

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