We've all been disappointed

When we left Nebraska in 1979 and moved to Bartlesville, Oklahoma, we had one person down there we knew and that was Richard Swan. We felt like we should go there to attend a Wesleyan college to prepare for the ministry. So we packed all we had in a 12-foot U-Haul trailer and headed to Oklahoma. Marge's dad had loaned us an old pickup with a camper on it, so we had a place to stay when we stopped. Anyway, we ended up in Bartlesville.

Our main car was a 1976 Dodge Dart with a slant six, so it got really good gas mileage, but it just didn't want to run right. There were times when it would just run perfect, so we never knew what to expect. I remember one year we loaded up the boys one evening and headed for Nebraska, which was a 750-mile trip. We were seriously homesick. We got north of Bartlesville and that old Dodge Dart went to missing. It would have been stupid to go on, so we stayed in Oklahoma. Talk about discouraged and disappointed. All four of us were in the dumps.

I think we have all experienced disappointment in one form or another. Growing up we were overly hyped up waiting to open gifts for Christmas and we got clothes. Clothes were a great gift and were needed, but I don't believe they were on our want list. Disappointments can go from super small ones to stupid ones to big giant disappointments.

Last summer, we were stretched thin getting the garden done and the new 30x60 high tunnel constructed and the death of Marge's sister in California. It seemed like we kind of got one task started and there were two waiting. One of the challenges was getting my tomatoes taken care of, and honestly I didn't do a real good job. They produced a lot of tomatoes, but not like they should have. So the crop was a disappointment. When all the dust had settled, I knew it was my fault. I was disappointed.

Sometimes it's people who disappoint us. We might have wanted them to do such and such and they didn't. Or we didn't want them to do such and such and they went right ahead and did it. Those who disappoint us might be our parents or spouse or friend or family or even a total stranger. Sometimes a friend will take advantage of us and use us. They may not intend on using us, but they do. When the only time we hear from some of our friends is when they need help, we are probably being used. Disappointed.

Back when I was pretty young, Mom and Dad loaded us up and headed to the Black Hills. Many times we'd stay at Custer, South Dakota, but for some reason we ended up at some type of place where one could rent an erected tent and then sleep in the tent. We were excited. So we all settled in and got ready for a night of rest. But the wind started to pick up and the temp started to fall and we were absolutely freezing. All four of us ended up sleeping in the car that night. Bummer. Disappointed. We had these huge expectations and the cold hard facts of reality set in and we froze. Disappointed.

A friend of mine owns maybe a dozen cows so he can realistically expect 10 or 11 or even a dozen calves. A couple years ago he ended up with zero calves. Not a single cow had a calf. Turns out the bull was only shooting blanks, and he wasn't any good, so not a single cow got pregnant. Talk about disappointment. He lost a sizable paycheck and all he ended up with was feed bills and such. Disappointment.

There have been years during deer season that I was elated and then there were the years I was disappointed and in the dumps. One year I was in the right place at the right time and made a seriously lucky shot with my old muzzle loader and ended up with an old 12-point whitetail. Talk about elated. But there were also those times when I hunted hard and couldn't even find some deer hair. Disappointed.

Disappointments are going to happen to all of us. They seem to be part of life. Matter of fact I can guarantee that sooner or later all of us will be disappointed. Sometimes disappointments happen because we have unrealistic expectations. I would love to have Marge buy me a new pickup for my birthday, but with all honesty I know that's unrealistic. When my birthday rolls around next January I would like an angel food cake with peanut butter frosting. That's realistic. And if she doesn't make it for me, I'll be disappointed.

Sometimes disappointments happen when we don't quite reach up to the expectations of someone else. Someone expects us to grow a weed-free garden. It's not going to happen around where we live. So maybe they are disappointed in us. We expect our kids to act in a certain way and they don't. Disappointed and maybe a little hurt. We expect to be fairly treated by our neighbors and it doesn't happen. Disappointed.

If someone disappoints us, then how do we deal with the disappointment as well as deal with the person? This is doubly difficult if they are a family member like our spouse or child. We can react and make a scene, which is probably what we feel like doing, or we can forgive them and go on living. They might not even know they disappointed us. They may be totally clueless as to what they did. Best course might be to forgive them and forget about it.

Sometimes we need to grow some thicker skin and let a lot of these petty things kind of roll off. Might even work on our feelings getting hurt as well.

Coffee update

Still drinking coffee from Ethiopia. When I unscrewed the lid on an old blue Mason jar where I store my roasted beans this morning, I noticed a hint of blueberries. The place in California where I buy my green beans had a sale on green beans from Ethiopia so I bought ten poundss. Looks like it's going to be an Ethiopian kind of summer.