Ways to help older adults feel the holiday spirit this season

The holiday season is the most wonderful time of the year. Cheerful decorations fill homes and businesses. People shop for the perfect gifts for their loved ones. Kids write starry-eyed letters to Santa, expecting a windfall on Christmas morning. A sense of anticipation fills the air, along with the smell of fresh-baked cookies or your favorite pie.

For older adults living alone, the holidays can bring happy memories of their youth, of time spent with family and friends, wonderful meals and bright faces around the Christmas tree. For some, however, the holidays can be a time of isolation and intense loneliness — particularly if they’ve lost loved ones or aren’t as mobile as they once were.

On the Lutheran Home campus, we see this frequently with our residents and their families. We work extra hard at the holidays to ensure those in our care live vibrant lives full of activities, companionship and purpose. We have lots of fun — older adults have so much to offer!

We found ourselves thinking about older adults and other people in our community who struggle with depression and isolation at this time of year.

A nativity scene outside of the Lutheran Home in Cape Girardeau. The assisted living facility works to focus especially on their core values of dignity, fulfillment and grace during the holiday season.Photo by Justin White

We all have people in our lives who could use some extra attention this season — but often, we may not immediately see the need. That means looking deeper, beyond the surface smiles and assurances they’re “just fine.” It may be a family member, a neighbor, someone you know from church or an organization, or a coworker.

The Lutheran Home holds six core values. Of those, dignity, fulfillment and grace are key to the way we treat others.We help those in our community maintain their sense of self-identity and dignity, support them in living fulfilled lives of purpose at any life stage, and extend grace as it has been given to us. These values really come alive at this time of the year. So, we’d like to share some ideas with you. As we go about our busy lives this season, checking off lists and trying to make it to everything on the schedule, here are a few ways to lean into the lives of those who may be struggling and make their season just a little brighter:

__Decorating__

Who doesn’t love a good Christmas tree? A wreath on the door? Festive greenery or candles? If you have an older family member or neighbor, they might enjoy having a tree or other decorations — but maybe they don’t have the energy to do it alone or don’t want to bother, since it’s just them. Offer to help them decorate with a tree party, or gift them a new wreath this year. Make it a fun occasion with hot cocoa and Christmas music. Remember, if they struggle to put up decorations, they might appreciate help when it’s time to take them down and pack them away, too.

__Shopping__

If someone doesn’t get out often or has mobility issues, they might really appreciate some help with any Christmas shopping they’d like to do. Offer to take them out one afternoon, then help them wrap presents for their loved ones. If that’s too much, stop by one day with hot cocoa and cookies for some online shopping.

__Holiday eats__

Remember the excitement of waiting for the cookies to come out of the oven? Or maybe that amazing candy only made at the holidays? Perhaps someone you know can’t manage quite as well as they once did in the kitchen, but would love to make their mother’s famous fudge recipe again. Schedule an afternoon to make holiday treats with them. Or, just bring some homemade sweets and snacks by on a festive plate for them to keep!

Knowing the season can be lonely for some people, you can always open your door, literally, by inviting someone over for a dinner with your family. Include them by asking about their favorite Christmas memories.

A Christmas tree is decorated at the Lutheran Home in Cape Girardeau. Helping older adults put up and take down Christmas decorations during the holidays can help share the Christmas spirit.Photo by Justin White

__Companionship__

At this time of year, sometimes just having people around can be a blessing. Maybe you can drop in with a thermos of warm cider and curl up for a nice visit with someone. Take someone to lunch or for a coffee date. Play a game of dominoes or cards. Even taking the time to watch a favorite Christmas movie with an older adult could make their day.

__Other ideas__

• Invite an older adult to a holiday church service or musical performance with you. Or, visit their church with them.

• Think about gifts for someone who is alone this season. Older adults often appreciate simple things, such as a bird feeder with seed, throw blankets, puzzle books, books, stamps and stationery, body lotions or a picture frame that can be loaded with photos of those they love. An e-reader or tablet is another great gift.

• Gather your family or some friends and go Christmas caroling at the homes of people who may not get out to hear holiday music.

• Help older adults feel a sense of purpose by inviting them to volunteer with you. Doing for others is often the greatest gift one can give themselves.

As you look for ways to show special attention to those around you, remember, it doesn’t have to be complicated. The most simple, intentional acts can make all the difference. The true spirit of Christmas is found in the heart and in the desire to give generously, love freely and extend the hand of friendship to others. You might find that Christmas isn’t just a day, but rather, a state of mind that can last all year long.

P.S. At the Lutheran Home, we provide each of our Health Center and Assisted Living residents with gifts. If you’d like to be part of brightening an older adult’s Christmas with us, visit http://www.lhc-living.com/giving/holiday-2023/ to make a donation or get gift ideas!