SOMETIMES WE HAVE TO LIGHTEN UP

Now that the unpresidential campaign of 1992 is behind us, perhaps "too little too late" will "trickle down" along with the purveyors of these overworked expressions. "Lesser of three evils" and "least of two evils" should vanish for a second reason: both are grammatically incorrect. The adjective is little, littler (or less), littlest (or least).

Samuel Johnson, in his 1755 dictionary, listed lesser as a "barbaric corruption." To him, it was a double comparison. A century later, some courageous Language Person decided that lesser was the comparative of less, and in time, less, lesser, least caught on. Lesser, however, was used in the sense of two, never three, and the usage prevails today: the lesser of two, the least of three or more.

Recently, a fan of Dear Abby's, inspired by her column referring to the many uses of UP, followed with examples of different ways to use this important two-letter word. We herewith add an accepted use as a verb up, upped, upping, ups: Work hard and your boss may up your salary. Should this occur, you might invite your friends in to help you celebrate what would precipitate up used as a noun. Why not let everyone join you in a joyous up?

Time was when "ain't" was not in any of our dictionaries, and schoolchildren delighted in telling offenders "There ain't no such word as ain't." Originally, ain't was spelled "an't", but the word dropped out of our dictionaries late in the 19th century, returning some decades later as "ain't." The Merriam-Webster Dictionary of English Usage devotes four pages to this history, but the contraction is still considered illiterate or dialectal in England and America. Anthony Burgess writes: "Ain't will always be facetious in British English, apart from Cockney." Americans don't take it seriously either, though we agree with the British that the contraction is less awkward than "aren't I?" or "amn't I?"

As Thanksgiving approaches, we receive queries about whether to write spoonsful or spoonfuls, cupsful or cupfuls. Words in this category were originally divided spoons full and cups full leading teachers and textbook writers to retain the s in the middle of the coinage. Authorities decided otherwise, preferring cupfuls and spoonfuls. Dictionary panelists now permit a choice, which will probably make little difference to writers of recipes. They have to abbreviate because recipe cards are so inadequate, aficionados wind up achieving results through trial and error.

To judge by the host of publications we see, writers are equally confused about till, until, and 'til. Many seem to think 'til is an abbreviation for till, and till an abbreviation for until. Not so. Both till and until are complete in themselves, and the only til in my dictionary is defined as the sesame plant, native to India, written without the apostrophe. However, Merriam-Webster, far more permissive than American Heritage, moderately approves 'til because those who use it do not know that till is an unabbreviated word in its own right. Just another way of saying ignorance is bliss.

Lately, readers have inquired about the use of "absent" as a preposition, as in: "Absent the proof, the judges could not sentence the prisoner." This usage is absent from the OED and most American dictionaries, but Merriam-Webster dates it from 1950 and avers it began in legal writing. Most women consider the usage a man's choice, but even Merriam-Webster's usage panel rejects it "by a thumping 92 percent in speech, 95 percent in writing." Roy Copperud of Merriam-Webster surmises that only time will tell whether the usage will ever gain wide acceptance.

Some years ago, my friend Henry Mueller wrote that a lecture by a noted speaker had positively "underwhelmed" him. "Underwhelmed" amused me, and I assumed Henry had coined it as the reverse of "overwhelmed." In recent months the coinage has occurred so often, especially among political commentators, I sensed it might have become official. Merriam-Webster states that it first appeared in The New Yorker in 1940, and that "more than one inventive writer" could probably lay claim to the creation.

This re-enforces my belief that Henry Mueller (among others) really did invent the term to muse others as well as himself. And though one usage panel dismisses it as "a joke that is no longer funny", Webster points out that any word that has increased in usage for more than 40 years is here to stay.

I may be prejudiced, but I think the usage panel that derides "underwhelmed" ought to lighten UP.