Selling snake oil to the boomer set

If you are over 40, they know about you.

They are out there and they know you will do anything you can to avoid looking and feeling like something out of the "Night of the Living Dead." They know you are from the generation that intends to make "60 the new 30." And they know you will believe anything they say and pay dearly for what they promise.

I say it is time for all of us in this target demographic to start acting like we are really from Missouri. In other words: Show me.

Let's start with two of the biggest scares for any of us rounding the bend: Memory loss and the aches and pains of arthritis.

If you have reached the half-century mark, you are no doubt terrified by those small little lapses in memory: Where you put the keys, that perfect word that used to be at the tip of your tongue, the name of your oldest child.

There are many products out there on the shelves with enticing names like "Cognimax" that promise to solve these problems. They all sound like Viagra for the mind but are unsupported by science. Ginkgo biloba is the best thing going and it has not been shown in controlled clinical trials to have any positive effect on memory in healthy adults. It has been shown to have a small positive effect on people with dementia and Alzheimer's.

That may be good enough for you but beware. ConsumerLab. com analyzed most of the ginkgo biloba supplements sold in the United States and found that only 22 percent of the products actually delivered sufficient amounts of the active ingredients that are supposed to be responsible for gingko's effectiveness.

This lack of quality control, by the way, is a notorious problem with nutritional supplements in general.

Now for arthritis. Finding relief from these aches and pains is a big concern for us in this country: We spend an estimated $10 billion a year on arthritis remedies that have no scientific proof to back them up.

It would seem that common sense would prevent folks from paying good money for copper bracelets and magnets in their mattresses or shoes, but guess again. These staples of the con-guys licking their chops at our pain are huge perennial sellers despite the fact that there are no valid studies to support their claims.

MSM, an organic sulfur compound that is often promoted as an arthritis aid, has no scientific support as to its effectiveness. It is derived from a substance known as DMSO, which is touted widely as an effective liniment for arthritis. The fact that it is also sold in your local hardware store as a degreaser -- and that it can be toxic -- doesn't seem to stop people from buying it.

It broke my heart to learn that one arthritis remedy is proven to be ineffective: the old folk remedy of taking a teaspoon of vinegar with one of honey. My grandmother swore by it as she square-danced herself into a fit old age. It is supposed to break up calcium deposits in the joints. Trouble is, calcium deposits don't cause arthritis. I have to admit I still indulge in this one. It makes me feel closer to my deceased grandmother and besides, it does no harm and costs very little.

There is a lot more where this came from. And I intend to continue reporting about this in future columns. As you might suspect, I am all for doing what we can to increase our health span. I just don't want to waste my time or pocketbook on it!

Dr. Michael O.L. Seabaugh is a Cape Girardeau native who is a licensed clinical psychologist with over 20 years experience helping individuals and couples with their emotional and relationship issues. He has a private practice in Santa Barbara and Santa Monica, Calif. Contact him at mseabaugh@semissourian.com.