RIVER CITY JOURNAL: YOU CAN GET THERE FROM HERE, BUT IT ISN'T VERY EASY

If you want to know why Missouri needs a real highway plan, try driving from here to Nevada on a rainy day.

Today's lesson is called "Simple Map Reading." You will need a Missouri highway map, a watch and a calendar. Let's begin.

First, find Cape Girardeau on the map. See it way over there on the right-hand side of the state next to that big river? Good. You're doing fine.

Now, can you find Nevada?

No, this isn't a trick question. Nevada is a pretty county-seat town full of antebellum homes, the mighty Tiger football team and the semipro Griffons baseball team. You don't say neh-VAH-da like the state. You say neh-VAY-da like that town in Iowa. As far as I know, no one famous was ever born in Nevada, Mo., although there are some claims on John Huston, the big movie director, whose parents were in a circus playing in Nevada at the time he was born. For many years Nevada was the home of the world's largest savings and loan, Farm & Home Savings. And the man who wrote the book on public water supply districts is a Nevada lawyer. There's some useful trivia.

But this is a map-reading lesson, not a history course. So try to find Nevada. You have 5 minutes.

Time's up.

See Nevada way over there on the left-hand side of the state next to ... Well, OK, Nevada isn't close to much of anything except the Kansas border, which is why the infamous Bushwhackers of the Civil War found the town to be so handy.

Cape Girardeau way over here. Nevada way over there.

Now we're ready for the hard stuff.

Find the best highway to take if you are traveling by automobile from Cape Girardeau to Nevada. You have five minutes. I'd give you the rest of the day, but you probably still wouldn't come up with the right answer. If you pick the most direct roads -- the black squiggly lines on your map -- please allow two weeks for travel. That's why you need the calendar.

Many years ago, my wife, sons and I lived in Nevada. Our younger son was born there. My mother lives on this side of the Ozarks. We tried many interesting ways to drive back and forth. We never found one.

In those days, U.S. 60 across the bottom of the state was still mostly two lanes. In addition to some winding stretches near Van Buren, there was that heart-stopping bridge over the Current River.

U.S. 60 has been transformed in recent years. Much of it is four lanes, although only a few miles meet interstate standards. The hilly area near Van Buren is crossed on three lanes -- a passing lane in the middle lets you get around slower traffic. And there's a new bridge too.

I had to go to Nevada last week. I had hoped the next time I had to go there Star Trek technology would have kept pace with cell telephones. Beam me over. Alas, Star Trek is still fiction.

So I drove. I debated whether to go the familiar U.S. 60 route or take the advice of countless counselors who strongly urged me to stick to the interstates. That would mean I-55 north to St. Louis, I-70 across to Kansas City and U.S. 71, which is mostly up to interstate standards, down to Nevada.

Look at your map.

Does the interstate route look like the most direct way to go from Cape Girardeau to Nevada?

Please give yourself five extra points is you shouted, "No way!"

In the interest of scientific inquiry, I decided to perform a test. I would drive to Nevada the U.S. 60 way, and I would drive home the interstate way. Here are my findings:

U.S. 60 way: First, you have to get to U.S. 60. You have two choices. You can drive west on Highway 34 until you hit U.S. 60 near Van Buren, or you can drive south (not exactly as the crow flies) to Sikeston and get on U.S. 60. I drove south to Sikeston. I regularly drive on Highway 34 to get to my favorite hometown. I'm not crazy.

It poured down rain from Sikeston to Springfield. Not one break. Fortunately, there wasn't much traffic either. And, thanks to the many improvements, it was pretty easy driving.

At Springfield, I took U.S. 65 north to I-44, then the interstate west to Carthage and U.S. 71 north to Nevada. I could have taken Highway 13 north from Springfield and U.S. 54 west to Nevada, but most of that is two lanes. I preferred the luxury of the interstate.

Total distance: 390 miles. You can calculate this yourself, using your map, if you want. But why bother? I just told you how far it is.

Now calculate how long it took.

Yes, this is a trick question. But you have to answer it anyway.

Coming home, I took U.S. 71 north toward Kansas City. Just past Grandview, I swung around the city on one of the belt roads, I-470, that goes through Lee's Summit and up toward Independence and I-70. You know the rest of the way: I-70 to U.S. 40 and I-64 at Wentzville, I-270 south to I-55 and home.

Total distance: 430 miles. Or 40 miles -- just 40 miles -- farther than the southern route.

I made one Necessary Stop going to Nevada. I made two Necessary Stops coming home. I tell you this because I included the time taken for these stops in the total driving time.

Getting to Nevada: 6 hours, 5 minutes. Getting home: 6 hours, 15 minutes -- just 10 minutes longer.

OK, class. Ready for a road trip?

As I told my wife, who is from the central part of the state near Kansas City, when I first brought her home to meet the folks: The only way to go to and from Southeast Missouri is by way of St. Louis. She didn't believe me. But she learned.

So the next time you head for Nevada, don't miss the Bushwhacker Museum or a double cheeseburger with grilled onions and Susie-Q fries at the White Grill, Harry Truman's favorite eating establishment.

And go through St. Louis. Wherever you're headed.

Class dismissed.

~R. Joe Sullivan is the editor of the Southeast Missourian.