RIVER CITY JOURNAL: SOMETIMES LIFE CLINGS TO SMALL SYMBOLS

A friend in Kansas is using a small piece of metal to remind him of the caring and prayers that come from the heart.

At first, it looked like a chain letter. I don't like chain letters. If someone makes the mistake of sending a chain letter to me, I throw it in the trash, even though I know evil spells have been put on me for breaking the chain. And, if you believe what chain letters say, I have lost millions of dollars because I didn't keep the chain letter going.

So much for chain letters.

But the letter on my desk wasn't a chain letter. I noticed a couple of familiar names from our days in Topeka, so I thought the letter might be of some interest.

Something else caught my eye. In the middle of the top sheet of the letter was a washer -- a flat, metal doughnut -- fastened with tape.

The envelope included a memo from Billie Hall and a note from Dennis Beitz. The three of us had been among the members of a leadership class in Topeka a few years ago. I thought they might be writing about a reunion or some other activity of the group.

Not only was Dennis a member of the leadership program, the agency he directs, Breakthrough House, was studied in some detail. Breakthrough House is a haven for folks who are learning to make it in the real world after struggling with their own demons.

Now, the memo and note told me, Dennis was engaged in his own struggle, a fight for his own life. He had recently learned he has colon cancer that has spread to his spleen and liver. He was to have surgery followed by chemotherapy.

I was stunned. It isn't the first time I've been told someone I know and respect had suddenly been forced to look into the face of Death. But it was hard to reconcile this medical prognosis with my own image of Dennis: tall, lanky, balding, outgoing, enthusiastic, caring -- and learning to roller-blade on the hard city streets.

The washer, I discovered, was something Dennis was using to maintain his own connection with the real world. Here's how he put it in his note: "This washer is a symbol of two things. First, it represents the circle of life and all that is important that goes with life. Second, the washer is a symbol representing the circling of each cancer cell and its destruction. Please take the washer and empower it through prayer, love, support and empower it with the energy needed to help me recover. Attach a note with a few key words and return the washer to me."

I called Breakthrough House a couple of days ago to see how Dennis is doing. I was told he had surgery and was recuperating -- slowly. He had made his first brief visit to Breakthrough House that very morning, but he was physically unable to stay very long.

There was something else in Dennis' note that you should know, because it will tell you something of his character. "If you see me, remember my approach is to be open and straightforward with what is happening. You will do me a big favor by using the same approach. So feel free to look me in the eye and ask how I feel and how treatment is going. Thanks for caring."

So, if it is OK with you, caring readers, I will return the washer to Dennis with a copy of this column. He will understand that it represents your prayers and wishes for recovery, even though you have never met him and probably never will. That's the kind of people you are. And I know it will mean a lot to Dennis to know that 40,000 or 50,000 good folks in Southeast Missouri and Southern Illinois are thinking of him.

~R. Joe Sullivan is the editor of the Southeast Missourian. If you wish to send Dennis a note or card (and a washer, if you want), mail them to Dennis Beitz, Breakthrough House, 815 S.W. Fifth St., Topeka, Kan. 66603.