REMARKS: PAY STUB IN POCKET PROVOKES THOUGHTS

Feeling something pricking my finger when I touched the bottom of my winter coat, I began a thorough search the other evening. The coat is old and worn. It has regular pockets and at one time had an extra set of pockets, higher up. Those pockets eventually wore out, creating a hole on each side, into the lining of the coat.

The thought of anything falling into the line had never occurred to me -- despite watching westerns in which coins or treasure maps are hidden in coat linings. Something was obviously there, though. "It feels like a dart," I laughed to myself, assuming it was actually a wire from the coat itself having worn its way through the cloth. I dug into the lining for the first time and to my surprise, discovered that it was, in deed, a dart from a dart board!

My curiosity piqued, I continued digging into the lining. There, to my surprise, I found a pay stub and mileage receipt stub. The date for each was Dec. 28, 1988! (That, of course, means the coat is at least 84 in dog years!)

It was fascinating to find the old pay stubs. One reason was the date. I was just wrapping up my first full-time job. I had been sports editor of the Dexter Daily Statesman since May 1985. Our publisher had started a bi-weekly paper in Kennett, to compete with the venerable Daily Dunklin Democrat and offered me the sports editor position there, at a hefty raise. I was ready for a change of scenery and took the position. This check would have been my last at Dexter.

It was also interesting to calculate where I've come financially since that time. My pay has increased by 34.1 percent in 12 years -- although it has gone up just 25.4 percent since January 1989, when the aforementioned raise kicked in. I need to do some checking and see how I compare to the national average and to inflation. I don't know if I've gained or lost ground!

It also made me think of something else. Had I found this a couple of months earlier, it could have been used for a political ad. "Are YOU better off than you where 12 years ago? If so/not, then vote/don't vote for the son of the guy who was vice president to the guy who was in office then!"

Well, maybe not.

I may have been the only Christmas parade attendee glad to see the vintage fire truck break down. Somehow I had the parade start time written down as 1:30 p.m. I was hiking toward the parade route about 1:20, when I noticed a marching band (It turned out to be Meadow Heights.) and floats heading down the street.

It took several days for me to get over my mad sprint in winter boots, down the sidewalk and street (obviously with no pre-sprint stretching) to try to get in front of the parade. Thanks to the stalled engine I was able to huff and puff my way somewhat close to the front. I imagine I witnessed about two-thirds of the parade.

I had to feel for the kids and adults marching through the snow, slop and wind. Of course if it were 70 degrees, we would be complaining because it didn't seem like Christmas!

I hope people check out the Oliver House. I had been in it two or three times before for Jackson Heritage Association meetings, but had never seen the whole house. Bern Schaper was kind enough to take me on a thorough tour of the place last week. It's a wonderful house to tour -- especially decked out in its Christmas finery.

In case I fail in my plans to have another column before Christmas, may all our readers have a blessed holiday season! Keep an eye on those hanging chads ... er, hanging stockings!