Ode to the fall guy

Congratulations, Scooter. You can take your place in the "fall guy" hall of fame now.

That's all right, don't be shy. We know it was an honor just to be nominated. But today, as you stand convicted of perjury and obstruction of justice and face up to 25 years in jail, you've made it.

You'll be immortalized up there with the likes of Tony Blundetto and Uncle Junior from TV's "The Sopranos." These are wiseguys who kept quiet and did years in prison for the good of the family.

There are other proud souls. Take Shyne, the up-and-coming rapper now serving 10 years in prison for rap-mogul P-Diddy after a 1999 shooting in a New York City nightclub.

And Scoot, you won't be the first or last fall guy to come out of Washington. Men like Richard Nixon's aides known as "the Watergate Seven" did prison time in silence, and Oliver North endured trial and conviction without ever incriminating his boss.

Inside the beltway, in organized crime syndicates and within the old Soviet KGB, it's all the same. Loyalty to the party, the cause or the family is the highest value of them all.

You've shown you're made of the right stuff.

You did it by hobbling into the courtroom on those crutches, gritting your teeth and keeping your mouth shut whenever possible. You're not a squealer, Scooter, but now to cement your status you've got to do your prison as silent as a monk. This, I've got to tell you, could prove difficult depending on your cellmate.

Now before you panic and start reliving episodes of HBO's "OZ," take a deep breath. You're not going to Pelican Bay or Rikers Island or even Potosi. You've committed a white-collar crime, and they wouldn't dare put you in with hardened criminals.

You'll likely find yourself in a minimum-security prison with guys who cooked the books or raided petty cash accounts. Plus, fall guys are always entitled to some perks from their connected network in the outside world. You'll probably have the warden fluffing your pillow and asking how you take your martinis.

There's still reason for hope. Somewhere down the line there may even be a pardon from the commander in chief. Bush won't leave office until January 2009, and any pardons he signs are going to be in the midnight hour, but it's something to look forward to. So be resourceful, Scooter. Drag out those appeals for years on end and you might even avoid jail time.

Mind you, it could all prove quite expensive. The Libby Legal Defense Trust has raised more than $3 million, much of it through online donations, but even that hefty sum could evaporate as this case drags through the appeal process.

As time goes on, it's going to get harder and harder not to start pointing fingers.

And you can't expect any pats on the back from your former boss. The White House's stated policy is "not to comment on an ongoing legal procedure."

That's just the way it is. Everybody appreciates the fall, but nobody wants to be seen near the fall guy.

I think one juror put it best in a news conference held outside the courtroom soon after the verdict was read.

"It was said a number of times, 'What are we doing with this guy here? Where's [Karl] Rove ... where are these other guys?' said juror Denis Collins.

"We're not saying we didn't think Mr. Libby was guilty of the things we found him guilty of, but it seemed like ... he was the fall guy."

TJ Greaney is a staff reporter for the Southeast Missourian.