New moms need not hide their problems

By Kristen Pind

Raising a child is hard work. Before your child is born you have this perfect picture in your head of what it's going to be like. You think it's going to be all rainbows and unicorns, not storm clouds and red marks.

I remember thinking when Cooper was born that he was the most perfect child ever made. I just knew he was going to sleep through the night, love me best and be the sweetest most adorable child in all the land.

And then my mom went home and my husband went back to work and I was home alone with an infant who didn't understand that sleep was a requirement.

Eventually I worked out the kinks; he got better at the sleeping and we moved on.

Before I had kids I was that judgmental person at the grocery store who told herself that a 4-year-old screaming in the cereal aisle was never going to be her kid.

I'm now that realistic mother who just leaves the screaming 6-year-old to his tantrum and goes to the next aisle.

I never imagined I would get a call from the principal either. Max and I joked before Coop started school that he was going to be the one the principal called, not me. Never did I think that we would actually ever be getting a call from the principal. Six months into the school year we've heard from our dear friend the principal three times now, and my kid has gotten red from his teacher on more than one occasion.

My point is that parenting is not a fairytale, and the sooner we realize this as parents the better. Instead of tearing each other down over food choices, TV time, literature and appropriate punishments we need to be supporting each other, sharing war stories and wiping away each other's tears.

How much better would parenting be if instead of being embarrassed to tell my friends that Coop is misbehaving at school and talking back to all the adults in his life I told them what was going on and asked for their advice? Instead of being worried they would judge my parenting based on his behavior I could be reaping the benefits of the mom with teenagers or the mom whose kids are grown who has been there.

From this moment on I'm going to be transparent with those in my life who have experience I can tap into. Those ladies in my Bible study group, the moms in the pickup line at school, the parents at soccer practice.

I'm going to be a sponge and soak up all of the information I can because it is better to be overly prepared than to not be prepared at all.

Here's to hoping that kindergarten ends on a better note than it began!