Live the life worthy of God's calling

Do you live your life for other people? Have you chosen a vocation because it was in the family? Did you decide on a particular occupation because others wanted you to or told you that you were perfect for the job? Or do you participate in activities because you feel that you must? Do you allow individuals to place you in a mold they perceived for you?

In the book "Personhood, The Art of Being Fully Human," author Leo Bascaglia says, "Life is an immense journey and each of us has only one lifetime to travel it. We will wind our own way continuously and relentlessly molding, growing, remodifying our undefined course, performing acts we can never redo on a path we can never retrace. Each moment moves us closer to the journey's end so that when it's finally reached it appears to be a vague, cluttered memory in our mind -- inexplicable, like an interrupted dream, felt, but half forgotten, and seemingly without purpose. Yet we will all take that journey."

Where do you start to begin that journey? Elie Wiesel in the book "Souls on Fire" asks, "Do I begin with my country that I know best -- but that is very large so I'd better start with my city? That too is very large. I had best start with my street, No, my family." Then he says, "Never mind I shall start with myself." Regardless of the substance of one's background, family of origin, education or help from others, you must make your own journey -- choose your own path when you're trying to reach a destination. If you continue to go the wrong way you will never arrive. The same holds true when you're searching for yourself, for what will bring you happiness. You don't want to choose the wrong goal, one that someone else convinced you of. If you make an inauthentic choice or, maybe take a route that someone else decided for you, it may fail to fit.

God created each person to be different. Our DNA is proof. The same is true of your talents and skills. No one else can contribute what you can give to the world. Humanity needs what each individual can provide. You need not try to be like someone else. Don't listen to what you think others want from you. You decide.

It's never too late to change your life. You ought not to continue performing a particular work just because you've always done it. If God gives you the inclination to make a change, regardless of your age and circumstances, free yourself from the chains of yesterday and escape. Escape into a new world of wonder, a world where you feel genuine and liberated.

James and Monica, in their 60s, decided to move across the country. They had lived in their present location most of their married life. The couple's children were grown but Monica prepared holiday dinners and provided a gathering place for her two bachelor brothers. The couple was reluctant to move to a new location and leave their former friends. However, the pull to live in a warmer climate won, and James and Monica purchased a home there. They could have stayed in their comfort zone and never pursued their dream but how content would they have been? James and Monica are friends, and I am so proud of their courage. Monica said that although she loved her brothers, she didn't feel she could give her life to them. Monica is now excited and looking forward to her new home in the South -- even though fright and guilt still lurk in the background.

Fear of change, of disappointing others, or having a lack of confidence are common reasons why people fail to become their authentic selves. Don't ask others what dreams you should follow. Instead, "start with yourself." Ask, what do I want?

Ellen Shuck holds degrees in psychology, religious education and spiritual direction and provides spiritual direction to people at her office.