It's so easy ... maybe too easy

When did I get too lazy to open a can of soup, dump it in a bowl and put it in the microwave? I'll tell you when. It was about the time Campbell's invented Soup at Hand. Now I'm sitting at my desk and drinking my lunch. (Apparently, I'm also too lazy to chew.) It's time to admit that I'm a convenience junkie, and there may not be a 12-step program for this one. If there were, it would probably consist of a bunch of men with their BlackBerry handheld organizers and a bunch of women with boxes of Homestyle Bakes and Reach Access Daily Flossers. (As a nation, we've become too lazy to pull out a foot of floss and put our hands in our mouths.)

Not to stereotype -- we ladies can love our electronics too -- but most of the women I know are looking for a way to make their lives easier at home.

Now that we're expected to bring home the bacon AND fry it up in a pan, we've found out microwaving the bacon is a lot easier. Luckily, there's precooked, microwavable bacon.

For my convenience dollar, the new cleaning products are the most wonderful things ever. I'm not sure when we got too lazy to squirt with our left hand and wipe with our right, but you can clean your entire home with predampened wipes. In my house, it's Clorox and Windex wipes for the kitchen and bath, Old English wipes for the furniture, Swiffer Wet Jet wipes for the linoleum floors. If I'm feeling really in the need for convenience, I switch to the Swiffer Duster.

(Reading this, my mother just turned pale and aged 10 years. Growing up in her house, it was strictly Murphy's Oil Soap on rags for the furniture, hand-scrubbing the floors with ammonia -- "It's the only way to get them really clean!" -- and Ajax, Ajax, Ajax.)

Heck, I'd even get one of those Roomba robotic vacuum cleaners if I didn't think my cat would have a heart attack.

I used to think all this convenience wasn't good for us as a nation. Now I think, "Hey, for every minute I'm not spending on my home, I can use it for the betterment of mankind. And isn't that the best thing for everyone?"

Then, satisfied, I settle in for the Monday night "Law & Order" marathon on TNT and some Soup at Hand.

My lovely friend and houseguest Nancy left my St. Petersburg, Fla., apartment this morning. My friend Guy will be here on Sunday. My in-laws will be here three days after Guy leaves. Two other friends will be here on consecutive weeks in May.

Don't get me wrong. I love to entertain, especially as I try to construct some sort of social life in my new home. Bring it on! But the recent influx of company has given me pause.

My last stint working in Cape Girardeau was from September 2000 through December 2003. In that three-plus-year span, I had overnight guests twice -- not counting in-town guests who passed out and had to stay overnight. I almost had a third visitor, that one from Indianapolis, but she got mono at the last minute. This despite reminding people about the Rush Limbaugh Hometown Tour, our excellent golf courses, the Trail of Tears and downtown nightlife.

I'm not sure, but I'm starting to think my warm location might have something to do with this.

Heidi Hall is a former managing editor of the Southeast Missourian who now lives in St. Petersburg, Fla.