Don't build a case against yourself

"This is a good place to work, but I'm about ready to go back into nursing," Joy recently declared. She was giving her best to the present job but wasn't satisfied with it.

"But it's hard to get a position in nursing nowadays," she added. I said I thought nurses were always in demand. She told me that a new nursing class had just graduated. "Ah-h," I thought. The glitch was there. What spurred her lack of confidence to get hired in the healing field? Why do many believe they can't achieve or attain their desires?

Another woman, Kay, said she and her husband wanted to relocate nearer to their business but they had not yet been able to sell their present home. When I agreed it would be great if they were closer to their establishment, she said, "But real estate prices have dropped and things are not selling like they were," and she gave a discouraged sigh. Hearing her feelings of doubt reminded me of various reasons people offer for giving up.

I cautiously advised both of my friends to stop building a case against themselves, suggesting their plans will materialize if they persevere. If you think and believe you're defeated you've caused your own failure -- even before you begin.

In Joy's situation, she was experienced as a nurse but was middle-aged and had been absent from the profession for some time. I viewed her age and experience as an asset rather than a detriment. She simply needed to possess a higher estimation of her abilities and state of life. The important criteria were belief in God's goodness and power and visualizing herself in the position, knowing that "With God all things are possible" Mark 10:27. That is, after following proper job-seeking procedures.

We truly can be our own worst enemy. If we would remember that God rescued the Jews from numerous insurmountable dilemmas, even when they complained, we would recognize he could and would do the same for us. Jesus went so far as to assure people if one has faith as small as a tiny mustard seed, nothing shall be impossible (Matthew 17:20). Wow! What a promise. Yet we continue building obstacles in our minds. We fear we are not as good or as capable as someone else. It often takes little to deter us because of our lack of self-esteem or the presence of seemingly negative circumstances keeps us from realizing our aspirations.

It's important to remember that outcomes and achievements are determined by what we think and do rather than by the opinions of others. Look at those people who are successful with jobs, families, health or spirituality -- it's because they've kept their eyes on the goal and refused to build a case against themselves.

Regardless of the real estate market, job loss, age or location, we're only defeated when we think we are. When we concentrate on fear or disbelief in our abilities we've provided food for failure. If we pity ourselves when we must undergo dismal situations, our hope can be dashed and depression can result. One truly does attract what he fears and also what he loves. That is evidenced in Scripture when Job stated, "What he feared most had come upon him" (3: 25). That reality is more than idle fiction.

We're told to support and empathize with those who suffer, but we must be careful to avoid feeding their despondency and self-pity. Many unlikely candidates succeed when they realize that, with God, it's possible to attain their goals even though someone else is seemingly more qualified. Refuse to judge from outward appearances and strive for your dreams. Beat the odds that say, "You can't," and decline to build a case against yourself.

Ellen Shuck holds degrees in psychology, religious education and spiritual direction.