Comparing yourself to others can be devastating

"As I drove home from a visit with friends, I felt rather sad," said my friend, Connie. I was surprised, because of all the people I know, she is one of the least likely to complain. I listened intently knowing something must be wrong. I wondered what had caused her disappointment.

"I had a wonderful time," Connie continued, "but I came away feeling as if my life hadn't stood for much. What I've done doesn't nearly compare to their accomplishments."

Connie had met with some former school classmates and they had all talked about their lives, what vocation they had entered into, and they shared other substantive information pertaining to their lives. Although I am reasonably sure the group shared ordinary, as well as success-oriented information during their conversations, Connie had heard only the good, notable and laudable accomplishments they shared.

Have we ever found ourselves in a situation where an intended fun and joyful occasion, later struck a chord of dissatisfaction within us? Perhaps we lack the education, financial security, family relationships, accomplishments, or even peace of mind that we see in others. Most people have experienced these feelings at one time or another.

Connie told me that she genuinely enjoyed the conversations with her friends, but later on, after pondering the experience, it bothered her. One of the participants at her dinner-out was a priest who talked about how fulfilling his life is in Kenya. He had evidentially shared many of the rewarding things he had accomplished in Kenya. He seemingly felt very happy and satisfied with his life. Another friend shared her experiences connected with her nursing career. Evidently she impressed the group, although not intentionally, with her contributions in the field of nursing. She too had seemed to have done much for God, in Connie's estimation.

Connie's life had taken a different turn, however. She had experienced many setbacks. Due to her marriage having ended in divorce, she was forced into raising her two children by herself. Connie never gave up, but stubbornly kept plowing through the difficult days of life, while with her abusive former husband. She worked non-stop to support herself and her children. As we talked, I could think of no one that had has led a more notable life. Connie is a great person with a strong faith in her God. It was this that got her through, she told me. The jobs Connie held consisted of work that entailed much efficiency and talent. Her favorite position was at a local church where she attempted to bring joy and comfort to those she served. There, Connie was an inspiration -- truly a joy to be around.

After confronting her thoughts about the feelings acquired at the dinner conversations, Connie came to terms with them. She became her own cheerleader. Rather than feeling depressed and unimportant, she began to build up within her mind, her contributions to the world, and for God. I tried to reassure her of all the good she's done and still provides. She began to see that she is very special in the eyes of God and, now, to herself. Her contributions, although not always recognized, were as important as those winning acclaim and recognition.

Often we search, within, to see what we will leave as evidence we were on this earth and in this world. Don't downplay what you do. It isn't necessary to perform a job, profession, or vocation that brings notoriety and supposedly changes the world, outwardly, but look towards accomplishments that laud their fame by the goodness they produce.

Connie recalled a favorite motto of Mother Teresa, "We can do no great things -- only small things with great love." (passiton.com) Jesus personified this quote. He did not seek to earn the favor of many of the rich and prominent people, and He sought no acclaim. His accomplishments weren't ostentatious, but merely simple actions that lead to greatness in the end.