BETWEEN THE LINES: MAGAZINE YIELDS TRIVIAL FACTS TO PASS ALONG TO READERS

Lately, I've been in a writing slump, and I think it's beginning to show in my columns. So to beat that slump, I spent a few hours last week at Kent Library trying to find some inspiration and ideas for column topics.

When I began writing this column, I didn't fully consider that it would be published EVERY week. Finding something worthy of writing about each week isn't always easy; hence, the slump. I thought I only had one good column anyway. (I'm sure some of you would agree with that, but I'm committed to the long haul, so there will be more to come.)

With all the news events lately, you'd think it would be easy enough for me to find something worth writing about. Not the case.

Most of the national and international news has been tragic. And I'm not in the mood for tragedy. What I was really looking for were some "news of the weird" items.

I don't have a collection of weird news tidbits or unusual stories I can tell you. But I'm ready to start such a collection. I tried to find some stranger than usual stories last week but was unsuccessful.

It seems there haven't been many weird stories lately. So I turned to some bizarre statistics instead. In an earlier column, I mentioned that I knew lots of useless information -- which I often share with family, friends and co-workers. Now I'll be able to share some of those tidbits with you, my readers.

While at Kent, I breezed through a favorite magazine filled with demographic information and statistics. It's come in handy several times before when I was looking for feature story ideas.

The magazine is designed for marketing-type folks; it tracks the latest trends in just about every aspect of America life.

If you want to find out who is buying cellular telephones and what type of vehicles they drive, this magazine will know. And if you want to know how often people eat ice cream and which flavors, these people know.

I was amazed at the amount of information the magazine's staff was able to discover about the buying public. And I was a little scared that people would actually find it useful for anything.

How do you get a job on this staff anyway? Is it sort of like a Jeopardy! quiz of endless trivia and stats? If so, I'd love to play since I specialize in useless information.

Who else gets to discover which greeting card holiday has the lowest card sales and then use that fact in a story?

In one magazine piece, the author explained that the greeting card industry is growing and so are the number of holidays created by the industry.

Someone actually keeps track of how many greeting cards people buy each year. And then that information is broken down by age group and holiday, for demographic and marketing purposes. Also, they keep tabs on what type of fast food restaurants are most popular by gender, as well as by age.

But the most interesting statistic I learned had to do with canned goods. Yes, canned goods.

Apparently, marketing executives and demographers are interested to know who, if anyone, alphabetizes their spices or canned goods.

I don't alphabetize nor do I truly care who does. And if I did so, I doubt I'd admit it to a national magazine.

But 12 percent of U.S. adults surveyed admitted to alphabetizing their spices and canned goods. Most of them were older adults, if that makes any difference.

If this ever becomes a Jeopardy! question, I'll be ready. But until then, it's just another useless bit of trivia that I felt obliged to share.

~Laura Johnston is a copy editor for the Southeast Missourian.