I want to share one habit that will revolutionize your relationships. If acted on regularly, this one action will revolutionize every relationship you have.
What is this one miraculous activity you may ask?
Play.
Yes, play. Having fun, laughing, being silly.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 and 4 says, “For everything there is a season … a time to laugh .. and a time to dance.” Laughing, moving and enjoying the riches of the gift of marriage, family and friendship is a gift from God to be acted on in the right season. Yes, there are times to labor, times to plant and harvest. Yet there are seasons to play in a way that glorifies God and restores us.
Play is a shared experience that creates mutual joy and draws people together, creating memories. If you cannot remember the last time you laughed with your spouse or played with your children, your marriage and family are likely in trouble. The greater the distance between the previous moment of mutual joy and today, the harder it will be to have a thriving marriage and family.
My kids laugh hysterically every time they tell the story of when I set the neighbor’s yard on fire with fireworks. They have relived that moment long after the yard recovered from the burn marks. That memory, at my expense, has brought us closer together.
Interaction is key when playing. Movies are great, but you each look at the screen and don’t interact. If you are going to the movies, elevate the experience. Go in costume. Make a meal of it. Talk about the movie afterward. Create ways to interact.
When playing, keep the goal of the goal. You are playing together to win the relationship through the shared experience. The goal, then, is not to make sure you obey all the rules of mini golf, for example. If breaking the rules of mini golf increases the laughter and joy and brings you closer together, then remember the goal of the goal.
Now, it may take time to increase your shared joy. Your relationship with your spouse may be fractured, and there may be distance between you and your children. If your relationships are on thin ice, it will take time to restore them. But the one action of play, of sharing an experience of mutual joy, acted on regularly, can breathe new life into a stale relationship.
Robert Hurtgen is a husband, father, minister and writer. Read more of him at robhurtgen.wordpress.com.
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