University Vandal Might Be On To Something

Someone gained access to the outside of the usually inaccessible Dome at Academic Hall on the campus of Southeast Missouri State University a couple of weeks ago.

The intruder used temporary scaffolding that had been erected next to the building for a construction project to climb the landmark and reputedly spray-paint graffiti on the base of the Dome including the phrase "Feed Me Money."

I don't know if that is true since the University quickly covered the defacement with a blue tarp, but -- if it is -- I think it is accurate.

The University is a large organization and like most large organizations, it requires vast quantities of money to keep going. Unfortunately, a large part of its funding comes from the Missouri state government which -- Hello! -- has none.

Much of the Show Me State's budget over the past two years has been propped up with emergency federal stimulus funding which will disappear in Fiscal Year 2011/2012.

If dire projections are accurate, the state's disbursement to our local University next year will be reduced to just $78 and a case of Mad Dog 20/20 to help take the edge off.

That's not good news for the University and obviously they recognize the fact. Everything is being evaluated from class size and schedules to entire degree programs to even temporarily curtailing the University's Fountain Initiative Program.

While the guv'nor has had an agreement with the state's public Universities over the past couple of years -- he guaranteed they would get a certain level of funding from the state if they guaranteed to freeze tuition and fees -- it looks like that deal is short in life.

My crystal ball tells me that University students throughout the state should plan for their education to cost a lot more in 2011/2012.

But there is a practical limit to tuition increases and that's when cost saving measures and non-education revenue becomes critically important.

And our friendly neighborhood vandal who apparently is not one bit afraid of heights may have hit upon a new revenue stream for the University:

Ads on The Dome.

The Dome is prime promotional real estate visible for miles. Some puritans might say that it is sacred ground, a part of our local history that should not be debased with advertisements of any kind. To do so would be as crass as hanging a banner between the legs of the Gateway Arch promoting a Big Mac special at St. Louis-area McDonald's.

Perhaps, I would have agreed with that opinion a couple years ago.

But I am a realist and the stagnant economy continues to drag on everyone. Money does not grow on trees as the saying goes. Revenue needs to come from somewhere. And fiscally SEMO is starting to look like Lara Flynn Boyle after a 30-day fast.

So I think it is time to shrug off these mores and embrace the brave new world that contains as much advertising as possible -- including using historical landmarks like The Dome at Academic Hall.

I even have a potential customer that would be perfect for The Dome's maiden advertising offerings:

The liquor department at Schnucks.

I think it would be ideal.

And if we're all lucky, maybe they'll even advertise a special on Mad Dog 20/20.