Brad Hollerbach is the Director of Information Technology for the Southeast Missourian. His opinions are his own and do not reflect those of the newspaper or its editorial board. He writes this blog primarily for his own amusement and to parody the absurdities of the world we live in. He lives with his wife and two cats that don't really care for one another in Cape.

Putting The Multi-Purpose Back In The Show Me Center

Posted Wednesday, January 27, 2010, at 12:00 AM

I was a sophomore at SEMO when the Show Me Center was built.

It wasn't always called the Show Me Center. During construction the facility had no name. It was simply called the multi-purpose building.

The building's name was chosen by committee prior to its grand opening in the fall of 1987. This was years before selling naming rights became the standard operating procedures for public facilities everywhere. Although nothing is stopping the University from pursuing this lucrative revenue stream now even though the facility has been named the Show Me Center for nearly 23 years. We can still call it that. That can be its base name. The University can then sell the "above the base" naming rights.

For instance, one of our area convenience store empires might want to pay the University a fee to brand the facility. "Rhode's 101 Stops Show Me Center" has a nice ring to it and it would be appropriate since they have a store right across from the venue on Sprigg.

Or how about "Domino's Show Me Center?" On second thought, that name does sound a little too much like a "gentleman's club." That might not be good for the University's image. Or then again, maybe it would be.

Being known as a "party school" has done wonders in terms of enrollment for a lot of universities over the years and I can't imagine there being anything that screams "PAR-TAY!!!!!" louder than having a strip-club right on campus. I bet if SEMO actually implemented something like that, enrollment would be at twenty or thirty thousand in no time flat.

Obviously that won't happen.

SEMO does have standards and being known as The Party School With The An Arena-Sized Gentleman's Club does not necessarily attract the type of students we want to attract.

No, the administration would definitely want to screen whomever they sold the Show Me Center's above the base naming rights to.

For example, they certainly wouldn't want to sell the rights to Three Rivers Community College. That could get just down right confusing.

"Welcome to the Three Rivers Community College Show Me Center at Southeast Missouri State University!"

Talk about an argument for wayfinding.

But I digress. While I was attempting to help the University bolster its dwindling financial resources, I've gotten a little off topic which is that I believe we need to put the multi-purpose back in the Show Me Center.

The arena is a big venue that sits idle much of the time. Oh sure, I know that it takes time to prepare the facility to host things like monster truck rallies and professional wrestling events and -- during this time of the year -- basketball games. But most of that prep work involves the arena floor area and the lower bleachers and the catwalks up by the roof.

However, I've noticed on my visits to the Show Me Center that the bleachers in the nosebleed sections are often vacant.

I believe the University could better use this significantly underutilized seating for classes.

For instance, rather than have 38 on-campus sections of the introductory English Composition course EN100 as the University offered this past fall, they could have just one really, really big class that meets 3 days a week in the upper bleachers of the Show Me Center. Don't think this is such a crazy idea. Mizzou has been doing these ginormous intro classes for years.

And best of all the University will save tons of money because instead of needing ten or so faculty to teach the 38 sections, they'll just need one.

Another great thing about this solution is that the Show Me Center has a lot of available nosebleed seating. While EN100 could be taught in the upper bleachers on the north side of the arena, a different freshman level class could easily be taught at the same time using the south side seating.

I could see both Intermediate Algebra 1 and 2 -- each has 24 sections -- as being perfect classes for the Show Me Center.

Fundamentals of Oral Communication and its 19 sections could also be easily taught here. This class was known as "Talking" when I was growing up, but by the time I was in college it was called "Speech."

Anyhow, I know that some professors might complain about getting assigned a class with potentially close to a 1000 students. Granted, that's a lot of grading.

But my advice is don't complain.

At least you have a job. And I'm sure that the University administration would recognize the fact that any of these classes would be a crushing workload by most people's standards so I'm sure that the unlucky faculty members who got chosen to teach any of these courses at the Show Me Center would be given a teaching assistant to help with all of the grading.

But just a part-time TA. After all, funding is tight.

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Maybe all events in Southeast Missouri should be held at the Multi-Purpose center. Better yet, shut down the student rec and aquatics centers to have more meeting space.

This would make wayfinding easy, you could just put an idiot-proof street sign on every corner in Cape Girardeau pointing the way to the Multi-Purpose Center. We can even include lodging at MPC by renting blankets and cushions so travelers can sleep in the bleachers and have a cheap alternative to hotels.

Or I have a better solution: strike a compromise with Larry Rice and use the bleachers as a homeless shelter. The odor may not be pleasant, but we could always give them access to the showers before games. The Larry Rice Multi-Purpose Center & Homeless Shelter!

Eww.

-- Posted by almighty on Wed, Jan 27, 2010, at 10:13 AM
Brad,

You may be onto something here. Creativity is generally the beginning of change and often times change is good. Just think, multiple remedial math classes could be conducted as one large class. Students could hold up large placards with numbers on them. For example, the south side could have all number two's. The instructor with the help of a TA of course, could get two students to hold up separate cards. The upper level class on the north side of the arena would respond by holding up a large 4. The remaining classmates would recite the addition as they went along.

The southside would then hold up another 2 and the north side could respond with a 6 and so on.

Now before the mathematics could get into double figures and of course a senior level class we would have to stop the north side at 8.

But, don't despair, here is the beauty of this plan for multi-use, multi-purpose. The students could actually get credit for two or more courses at the same time! Remedial math, and Speech. Think about it, "2-4-6-8 Who do we appreciate?" I'm sure the new title sponsor could be worked into the equation. How about, "HOLLERBACH'S at THE SHOW ME CENTER". Now that's multi-purpose and allowing SEMO to do more with less in this economy!

Before you run any more diatribes for the public, you should help clear up some public misconceptions. The Show Me Center does not have any "bleachers". All of the seats are chairbacks. Secondly, "nose bleed seats" don't exist there either. "Nose bleed" could be defined as located where you have to look down on the "high wire" acts! That is not the case in the multi-purpose building.

As for Hell and Damnation's critique, he sounds like a very bitter old man with a convenient memory. To intimate that the Show Me Center has not been a huge asset to this community over the last twenty years indicates that he is either Archie Bunker's brother or has been or has been living under a rock all these years.

-- Posted by Rebel on Wed, Jan 27, 2010, at 12:46 PM
hows about just simply "Fieldhouse"...? I know, the Show-Me is not quite an arena, and not quite a fieldhouse. Besides, then the SEMO power players would have to create new team chants, such as "CAPE ROCK - RED HAWK!!", and all the phony ceremonial stunts to match their Big 12 friends...

-- Posted by jacksonjazzman on Wed, Jan 27, 2010, at 12:56 PM
Rebel,

You are a genius! Students will be able to take classes twice as fast if they can take two at a time. Sorry about the bleachers error. My bad. Actually, since they are comfy seating, we might be able to add a class surcharge of say $5. Pay the $5 and you get a chairback, otherwise park your caboose on the concrete stairs.

While I'm flattered to think we could name the arena "HOLLERBACH'S at THE SHOW ME CENTER" I'm quite confident that I couldn't afford the naming rights. Come on. I work for the newspaper and my wife works for the University. 'nuff said.

Perhaps, we could afford to have a nice urinal named after us. It would be kind of appropriate.

Thanks for reading.

-- Posted by Brad_Hollerbach on Wed, Jan 27, 2010, at 2:12 PM
Sharon, the newspaper's super-duper librarian, shared with me a story that had all the various names that were considered back in February 1987.

There were a few dozen, but here are some "choice" names that were passed over:

Mississippi Dreamway (huh?)

Steamboat Station

Dream Palace

Peachtree Palace

Common Grounds (boring!)

Uptown Arena

SEMO Summitt

Cape Carnivale

The Moccasin (Thank goodness we didn't name it that!)

Cape Girardome

I also heard that Shumate's Shoebox was an option although that apparently didn't make it to the final list.

TFR

-- Posted by Brad_Hollerbach on Wed, Jan 27, 2010, at 2:19 PM
Way to go Rebel! I really think you're on to something!

The difference in the SMC and the Hearnes Center at Mizzou is that there are actually lecture halls at Hearnes. Students aren't just herded into the bowl of the arena for a giant lecture class (unless you count graduation!). There are four "rooms" in the upper deck (I think this is the term you were searching for, Brad) and they have partitions that can be opened to be part of the arena for events, or they can be closed to completely segregate the hall from the arena floor (and other classes). The Show-Me Center doesn't have these... so all courses held within the arena itself would blend together.

Also, just because the events themselves take place on the arena floor does NOT mean there isn't work taking place in the seats or on the catwalks and rigging above. Would you want to sit through College Algebra with dumptrucks unloading dirt for a rodeo? How about while they're testing the sound system for a concert? Would you like to give a speech at the same time that a stage is being built, or while the workers are hanging curtains? I know I wouldn't. It takes a lot more work to bring in an act, set it up, run the show, and then load it out and clean it up than most people think it does. The SMC would need a much larger crew to maintain the building daily if classes were held there.

Saving money or not... The Show-Me Center is NOT a classroom. Multi-purpose, yes. Classroom, no.

-- Posted by christianchemist on Wed, Jan 27, 2010, at 2:58 PM
Yes, Christianchemist, we all realize that the Show Me Center is not a classroom in the conventional sense of the word.

However, this blog tends to approach things from the less than conventional perspective. Considering the dire financial shape of most higher educational institutions -- SEMO included -- we're just trying to find a way for the University to tread financial water.

And if that means a 1000 freshmen have to suck it up and tough out taking a class in working arena (REVENUE IDEA - Rent Hardhats to all students taking Show Me Center classes), then I say, so be it.

Life is hard. They might as well get used to it.

TFR

-- Posted by Brad_Hollerbach on Wed, Jan 27, 2010, at 3:15 PM
Why not just sell the confounded thing to a television preacher. Just add a 20 story steeple(actually a disguised TV broadcast tower)that could be seen anywhere 30 miles out. Add a world class pipe organ. Acoustics might be bad, but sound engineers could fix that.

Broadcast will be channels on cable networks, websites, satellites, etc to reach a worldwide audience. Think of all the money coming into Cape due to the consatant fund raising telethons. And all the jobs created.

And the whole complex could be named "The Church of Show-Me the True Way". It ain't gonna get any better than this.

-- Posted by voyager on Wed, Jan 27, 2010, at 3:16 PM
The brilliant suggestions just keep coming. "The Church of Show-Me the True Way" is quite good, Voyager. Wonder if the University would allow Baptisms to be done in the aquatic center?

TFR

-- Posted by Brad_Hollerbach on Wed, Jan 27, 2010, at 3:24 PM
Brad,

While I'm sure that the Show Me Center would not reject your urinal sponsorship offer, I do want to clarify. Any inference to my proposed title sponsorship and your last name was purely coincidental. Ya see, where I'm from, when you have a vocal action and a response, in this case the South & North shoutouts for math and speech class, it's called a "hollerback" or sometimes "hollerbach". It is the predominant teaching method in some areas of the country, even more prominent than "Phonetics" or the currently popular "Sylvan Learning".

I am sure the Show Me Center has an educational mandate as well as a publicity mandate for the City of Cape Girardeau. What could be better than highlighting a new teaching method and bringing notarity to Cape Girardeau? With the increase in students SEMO will gain from wanting to learn the "Hollarbach" system, they'll be able to pay the title sponsorship fees thereby keeping everyone happy.

Maybe we can even find a way to incorporate this system with the Downtown Golf Course. You know, one person hits the ball and another Hollerbach's, "I got it!"

-- Posted by Rebel on Wed, Jan 27, 2010, at 3:51 PM
Oh man, I wasn't aware of the dire financial situation! WAIT! That was sarcasm. As a student at one university who takes classes on another campus, I probably know that better than anybody. Why, you ask? Because I'm billed for both places. Maybe SEMO could start doing THAT! Charge the ITV students $100 for being located at a satellite site, and then charge them another $100 to originate the signal from SEMO's campus. Oh! And while we're at it, we can charge all the students in SEMO's ITV classes $100 to send the signal somewhere else. That'll cause enrollment to go through the roof! And since it's all in the name of educating the populace, everybody will agree to it, right?

No?

Well... I guess we could just hold classes in the meeting rooms at the Show-Me Center then. At least they have walls that can be closed so students don't have to hear four lectures at once.

-- Posted by christianchemist on Wed, Jan 27, 2010, at 4:10 PM
Oh, I'm sorry Rebel. I misunderstood you. I suppose that considering how uncommon my last name is, that I assumed your reference to "Hollerbach" was referring to me personally rather than to the communication process hill billies often use when they making moonshine on adjacent hilltops.

Wonder if I could have my pick of urinals?

TFR

-- Posted by Brad_Hollerbach on Wed, Jan 27, 2010, at 4:18 PM
Could the head be a subdivision of the SEMO U called Peon U?

You know if the suggestions of this blog would just be implemented the City of Cape would overwhelmed by people wanting to move here. The entertainment industry would flourish, the sport fishing would expand, and the university would be able to make more money from the naming rights for all the restrooms on the campus. Now there is some serious money to be made.

I heard a rumor that the National Kazoo recital was coming to the River Campus. Now that will probably draw enough for the city to balance the budget.

-- Posted by IonU on Wed, Jan 27, 2010, at 8:28 PM
Sadly,IonU none of the brilliant money making ideas that are both brought up in my blog and by like minded readers in the comments will probably ever see fruition. Good ideas are often not taken seriously, by The Establishment.

For instance, a National Kazoo recital sounds like a winner. I'd go.

TFR

-- Posted by Brad_Hollerbach on Wed, Jan 27, 2010, at 10:46 PM
A few of my thoughts:

1. Location, location, location. Great for SEMO students who live on campus. Not so much for the world. If they planned on using this little arena for community and other events, then finding it shouldn't involve a comprehensive tour of the Cape streets. If you are coming from outside the city on I-55, you still have a significant maze to navigate once you leave the main highway. And being so centrally located, once you leave an event,finding a snack is bit complicated. Well, there is Rhodes for some delicious week old donuts.

2. Maybe there needs to be a better public relations effort? I read the SEMissourian everyday and listen to both local radio and tv stations. Yet was surprised to read the story about Mike Rowe's appearance last night. Nice article, but maybe some better publicity before the event would help. I am a fan of his show and would have attended had I known. I am sure there was something on their flashing sign - but most area residents don't drive up Sprigg on their way to nowhere on a regular basis.

3. If you've ever been to the center at night you will appreciate the subdued eclectic lighting. That is until you try and walk through the parking lot and find the entrance. It's not like there aren't a bunch of steps, curbs and other obstacles in the way. And if you don't park in front, finding the right door is a challenge.

4. On the positive side, I have attended a few SEMO athletic events. I enjoy having my choice of several thousand seats. I don't ever remember being there when the amount of players and cheerleaders on the floor didn't exceed the number of "fans" in the seats.

-- Posted by ParkerDaws on Thu, Jan 28, 2010, at 6:21 AM

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