- Cape student sues, accuses school officials of slamming her to ground multiple times (04/28/16)47
- Neelys Landing man shot, killed by highway patrol trooper after traffic stop (05/01/16)43
- Bob Evans restaurant in Cape Girardeau among chain's 21 closings (04/26/16)9
- Missouri House votes to allow concealed weapons without permits (04/28/16)8
- Police report filed, but no charges in incident at Cape Central (04/29/16)40
- 2016 All-Missourian Boys Basketball (04/29/16)
- Statement: Man says cops’ good work drove him to grow his own marijuana (05/01/16)1
- Two hurt in motorcycle wreck on Interstate 55 (04/25/16)1
- Senator introduces bill for I-57 that would connect Sikeston with Little Rock (04/28/16)4
- River Ridge Winery changes hands (05/02/16)
Shape Up Cape
The Fit to Print team earned 800 points during the last week.
Our competitors: St. Andrew Lutheran Church's Fit for Eternity team earned 853 points. The public library's Bookin' Team earned 309 points.
Sam Blackwell 101
Andrea Buchanan 94
Spencer Cramer 72
Heidi Hall 69
Jamie Hall 76
Gabe Hartwig 112
Laura Johnston 50
Heather Kronmueller 80
Bob Miller 60
Joe Sullivan 86
Goodbye, Dave and the bimbos on "Caribbean Workout." Hello, Gilad on "Bodies in Motion."
Ends up Gilad's show airs on The Health Network at 11:30 p.m., right after Dave's. Gilad is in Hawaii instead of Barbados, so his tax dollars are staying right here in the United States.
Gilad uses techno music instead of the reggae stuff. Reggae music is better known for making listeners want a frozen cocktail more than a workout.
Gilad's backup dancers aren't all female, so it gives us ladies a little something to look at while we huff and puff.
And finally, perhaps I'm being naive, but I think Gilad may be straight, allowing me to imagine myself sipping pina coladas on one of those exercise mats he uses while wrapped in each other's arms looking out at the sunset. Maybe he's sick of all these skinny girls he works with.
Forget this journalism gig. I think America's ready for my how-to-go-running starter's kit.
"Yes, in this limited-time offer, you too can own a beautiful and rugged all-terrain package perfect for the runner in your life. We'll include this stylish famous-brand AM/FM sports cassette radio with a free 90-minute mix tape of all of today's workout favorites (insert any song from "Jock Jams Vol. I" here). Call now and we'll include this free leather-like carrying strap.
"But that's not all! With your order we'll include a pair of luxurious absorbant sweatbands, perfect for soaking up all the sweat you can dish out; a double-sized order of mosquito repellant, guaranteed to shoo away those pesky outdoor bugs (insert a loud "ouch!" here); a stylish 'do rag in your choice of color, perfect for keeping that annoying, sweaty hair out of your face; and a trendy sports watch, complete with a lap timer and heart monitor! Amazing!"
Now if I can just find a pitchman to make the sell. Dan Walters, let's talk.
People I barely know ask me how my Shape Up Cape is going. It's kind of a personal phenomenon, really. I write stories, some serious and political in nature, others (hopefully) heart-warming.
But according to an official poll, 82.39 percent of the feedback I get from folks I run into is about my exercise routine. Most of the people who ask about me probably read nothing else I write and have no clue what tax-increment financing means. Why people care if I'm doing my cardio is a mystery, but it's cool they're following along. I'm afraid I've been letting our Shape Up fans down a little lately, however.
Last week I had a good excuse. Really. I was coughing up a lung most of last week and still managed to do some light exercises (walking, for instance) and score 60 points. Not bad, if I say so myself.
Things I've noticed since Shape Up Cape started this summer:
Good teammates. Hooray!
Sunrise over the Mississippi. Hooray!
Heat and humidity. Hiss!
Cool mornings. Hooray!
Loose dogs. Hiss!
Wild foxes. Hooray!
Shorter days. Hiss!
Jogging farther. Hooray!
Gaining weight. Hiss!
More muscle. Hooray!
Temptation to calculate 12 points for jogging half an hour even though it only took 28 minutes -- uphill both ways ... honest. Hiss!
Hearty appetite. Hooray!
Two more weeks. Hooray!
Next week you'll hear from the other members of our team.