Waiting is one of the hardest things to do

Sunday, December 11, 2011

"I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning -- more than watchmen wait for the morning."

-- Psalm 130:5-6

I wonder how watchmen wait for the morning?

From the beginning of their shift at the darkness of night until the first glint of sunlight, they must stay transfixed on it. It must always be in the back of their mind, as the goal they are working toward but can't rush along.

There must be moments when it feels as if time has never passed slower, and they just want morning to hurry up and happen. There must be moments when they are tired and want to give up on morning, thinking it will never come. But then the first rays of light dance along the horizon, and the sky turns colors so beautiful they don't have a name. The morning -- their refuge and sanctuary, the time when their job is done, the night has passed in safety, and they get to go home to sleep, relax and be with their family -- comes. And it comes beautifully.

Waiting is one of the hardest things to do. In our fast-paced culture of instant gratification, waiting is countercultural. It's radical because it's surrendering being in control of a situation and not always having immediate answers. It may feel uncertain and not really be clear as to what we're supposed to do as we wait.

I think waiting on the Lord is a time to bask ourselves in who he is, placing ourselves before him in hopeful expectancy and faith, trusting that if we seek him, he will find us.

The words of Psalm 130 bring life to my soul. In its poetry, I hear and feel the psalmist's yearning just to be with the Lord. His confidence in God's faithfulness and faith that because he is waiting for the Lord, the Lord will come to him and provide all he needs, takes my breath away.

I want to have the courage to wait this steadfastly and confidently on my God, trusting in his faithfulness to me. I want to learn to wait joyfully, with bated breath in anticipation of my beautiful God and the things he does that make life so worth living.

I love that the same God the psalmist yearned for is the same God my soul desires to be with. I love that this God is the same one the Israelites in their exile yearned for, the same one whose chosen people waited on to save them. I love that the wait ended more beautifully than anyone expected when the same God came down from heaven as a little baby boy to live a life of radical love that turned the world upside down.

This God is trustworthy. This is the God I want to learn how to wait for and with this Advent, knowing that he is coming to save me and that he is guiding, teaching and loving me through every night until the morning comes.

Mia Pohlman is a Perryville, Mo., native studying at Truman State University. She loves performing, God and the color purple -- not necessarily in that order.

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