- New custody law for equal time for dads begins today; some question law's relevance (8/28/16)5
- Former alt-rock frontwoman tells how she found Christianity (8/29/16)2
- Ex-Southeast student gets probation for placing homemade sex video on porn site without woman's knowledge (8/24/16)13
- Bootheel lawmaker seeks probe into crop damage by illegal herbicide spraying (8/24/16)1
- Local priest met Mother Teresa, will attend canonization (8/31/16)
- Jackson girl stays planted on the farm (8/28/16)2
- Wal-Mart theft probe yields drug charges against woman (8/31/16)
- Newsmakers 2016: Liz Glastetter (8/15/16)
- Scott City School District introduces new preschool program (8/26/16)1
- Cape police: Illinois union president hit woman in head with rock (8/28/16)3
Please help with our trip to Mexico
To the editor:
Dear President Bush: I'm about to plan a trip with my family and extended family. I'm going to walk across the border from the U.S. into Mexico, and I need to make a few arrangements. I know you can help. Would you mind telling your buddy, President Vicente Fox, that I'm on my way? Please let him know that I will be expecting the following:
1. Free medical care.
2. English-speaking government bureaucrats.
3. Government forms printed in English.
4. English-speaking teachers.
5. Classes on American culture and history.
6. The American flag flying on the top of the flag pole with the Mexican flag flying lower down.
7. Please plan to feed my kids at school for both breakfast and lunch.
8. I will need a Mexican driver's license so I can get easy access to government services.
9. I do not plan to have car insurance and won't make any effort to learn local traffic laws.
10. Please be sure all police officers speak English.
11. I plan to fly the U.S. flag from my house, put flag decals on my car and have a celebration on the Fourth of July. I do not want any complaints from the locals.
12. I would also like to have a nice job without paying any taxes.
13. Please tell all the people to be nice and never say a critical word about me or about the strain I might place on the economy.
ROBERT T. KRONE Jr., Cape Girardeau