Auctioning Off The Queen's Undies

The short headline of the short article caught my eye: ~Queen Elizabeth's Underwear Up For Auction Those six words instantly captured my curiosity. I had to know why Queen Elizabeth was selling her undies. I know Britain's economy is in the toilet -- Or should I say, loo? -- but isn't selling off your underwear pretty much the very last thing of value anyone should liquidate? And that's if the underwear is still new in the plastic bag from the manufacturer. If the underwear has been rode hard and put away wet -- so to speak -- who in their right mind would want it? I read the short news story -- considering the subject matter, a brief brief one could say -- and discovered that the Queen was not who was actually selling her underwear. It was a relief to know that the Royal Family is not so destitute that to pay for the upcoming marriage between Prince William and Kate Middleton, the Queen is forced to sell her excess undergarments on eBay and Prince Charles is hawking Officially Authorized Buckingham Palace Cookware as Today's Special Value on QVC.

Actually the underwear is being sold by the estate of a deceased Florida playboy who has reputedly had the apparel in his possession since 1968. That raised more questions in my mind. I may be a packrat, but I have no desire to hang on to any of my own underwear that I wore 40 years ago, much less anyone else's even if that someone else is someone famous like Queen Elizabeth. When underwear gets to a certain age and a certain amount of rattiness, I believe it should be thrown away or after a thorough washing, used as a rag of some type. But this playboy, not only kept the Queen's undies for 40 years, he apparently had the foresight to have them clearly marked so the executors of his estate didn't just throw them away. Were they in a box marked "The Queen's Undies. DON'T PITCH!" or did he have them stuffed and mounted over his fireplace like a trophy deer? Considering that the man was reported to be a "playboy" this would not be surprising. And how exactly do we KNOW these are in fact Royal Underroos? Are the words "Property of The Queen" scribbled in permanent marker on the waistband? Or are they made out of cloth sporting the Royal Crest? And has a DNA test been done to verify that Queen Elizabeth once wore these undergarments, herself? Of course, what I'm sure everyone would like to know is what the heck was the Queen doing 42 years ago that caused her to mislay this intimate apparel? Reputedly these wayward underpants were "accidentally left on a private plane during the Queen's visit to Chile" in 1968. How does one do that? I could understand if the Queen misplaced her eyeglass case or lost her iPod, but her underpants? And she lost them on a plane? Except when I'm in the shower, I always have a very clear idea where my underwear is. And if by some miracle, my underpants ever hit the auction block, I guarantee that I will be in them.