- Cape Rolling Out Bloomfield Road Art Trail (8/21/19)1
- Donors Pledge Almost Two Grand To Replace SEMO's Possibly Sentient ‘Gum Tree' (8/16/18)
- SEMO and The Will To (Become A Consultant) – Part 2 (6/14/18)
- SEMO and The Will To Do (You Really Want To See That Legal Notice?) – Part 1 (6/4/18)
- Judge, Jury... Trashman (6/1/18)
- Diary of Cape Girardeau Road Deconstruction (5/11/18)
- Trying To Save A Tree From City “Improvements” (4/30/18)2
'Personal and Confidential' Mail Is Anything But
I got a letter from my health insurance company the other day.
The outside of the envelope told me that it was both "Personal and Confidential" in big and bold type.
Since this was from my health insurance company and they used very big and very bold type on the envelope to warn me that the contents were both "Personal and Confidential," I was immediately concerned.
Had my insurance records been broached? Was some hacker hoodlum scattering my personal health information across the Internet willy-nilly?
Or did I have some disease that I was not yet aware of, but my omnipotent insurance company had detected and was just letting me know that they considered it a pre-existing condition which they weren't going to cover. Oh, and to have a nice day.
Or was I experiencing a moment like Bruce Willis in the movie The Sixth Sense, and was going to find out that I had actually died -- possibly even from the disease that I didn't know I even had -- and my insurance company was informing me that I was no longer going to have to pay my premiums. I guess there is an upside to being dead.
So anyhow, all of those paranoid thoughts flashed through my head as I tore open the envelope and quickly scanned its contents.
"Dear Valued Member" the enclosed letter started.
My fears quickly disappeared only to be replaced by disgust. No one starts an actual "Personal" message with "Dear Valued Member."
This official looking document from my insurance company was in fact an advertisement for Zyrtec and Visine-A. The only thing "Personal" about the whole mailing was the fact they had my name and address printed on it.
And I guess I've blown the whole "Confidential" part by writing about this on my blog.
Whoops.
I'm not really sure who I'm not supposed to tell, but if they say this advertising is "Confidential" then by golly it's confidential and I won't say another word about it or at least not until I'm finished with this particular blog. Then my lips will be sealed.
I scanned through the document and noticed near the bottom in bold -- but not so big -- type that this junk mail -- my words, not theirs -- had been funded by the corporation that makes Zyrtec and Visine. No surprises there.
In the same paragraph, it enlightened me that "no patient information" had been provided to that corporation. That was a relief.
And below that paragraph -- after a sentence telling me that this advertising was meant to be educational and should not be considered medical advice and after that there was another that recommended I consult a physician for any specific treatment options and then a third telling me that my insurance company and the drug company neither endorsed nor were responsible for the other's portion of this mailing -- was a note informing me that if I wished to NOT receive any of these future junk-mailing -- again my words, not theirs -- that I could call the provided phone number.
Not only was that sentence buried deep within the fine print, the type was neither big nor bold.
I guess they were trying to keep that phone number confidential.
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My Google Search Results for this week have rocketed to 1700 this week. I think this has a lot to do with our new online editorial system which has shorter, less complicated URLs than our previous system. However, I have faith in Google that they will cut me off at the knees any day now, and my totals will once again plunge.
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